Breaking Point
by CherryXButterfly
Summary: When she returned from war, Hinata didn't realize just how much it had truly affected her. Stricken with depression, she closes herself off completely. Everyone, especially Naruto notice how much more withdrawn she's become. Can he help her? NaruHina
1. Tormenting Feelings

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters. If I did, NaruHina would've happened a long time ago. **

**A/N 12/17/13: I had a new idea! Yay! It's a tad on the sad side, but yes it will get happier. I don't know how many people are going to enjoy this, but let me put this first one out there! Let me know what you think! **

**Summary: When she returned from war, Hinata didn't realize just how much it had truly affected her. Stricken with depression, she closes herself off completely. Everyone, especially Naruto notice how much more withdrawn she's become. Can he help her? NaruHina**

**Warning: None yet. **

**Chapter 1: Tormenting Feelings**

* * *

It was late at night. Yet she was up. Tossing and turning ensued but she still couldn't sleep. She was trying so very hard. This was how it had been since the war had ended. They'd won, and it was a glorious victory, hopefully one that would end any chance of a war any time soon. She should be happy right? She was, she really was. But at the same time, her mind wasn't letting her.

'_Come on Hinata just a few hours of sleep. You can surely do that, can't you?' _she repeated to herself over and over again.

Even chanting to herself was futile. Her mind was feeling too incredibly restless. Every time she even felt a bit of sleep, her eyes shot back open when scenes from the war played back in her mind.

She sighed and slipped out of bed. She could see the clock from the corner of her eye. It was almost 4 in the morning. She went into the bathroom and turned on the faucet and began splashing her face with the cold water. It was the middle of winter, but she didn't care. She looked up at herself in the mirror and nearly cringed at what she saw. Tears threatened to fall when she saw just how gaunt her face looked. There were dark circles under her eyes and her eyes were shrunken in. Her already pale complexion was paler than usual, and her body as a whole looked a lot thinner.

"You're a shinobi, you should be used to seeing bloodshed! Death is part of life, you can't let something like that get to you!" she said to herself. This was something she'd say to herself often since she had returned from war. But even she couldn't get herself to believe it. When she had to go train in a couple of hours, she'd just say that she was just a little tired.

She opened her cabinet and stared at the bottle of sleeping pills. She had bought it recently when she realized that there was no way in hell that she could drift off to sleep on her own. She didn't tell anyone about it, because if she had, she was afraid that people would think she was suicidal or something. People had forgotten the real purpose of these pills. She stared at the clock and sighed. She'd have to skip out on taking them tonight. If she took them now, she'd be out for hours and miss her morning training.

She slammed the cabinet shut and sluggishly made herself walk back to her bed. She was hoping that she would fall asleep the minute that her head had hit the pillow. As usual, she had been wrong. She was tired. Her body was anyway, her mind however wasn't. She continued to stare up at the ceiling, drawing patterns with her eyes, but the only thing she was able to draw were scenes from the war…

* * *

Kiba and Shino were in there usual spot, just waiting for their teammate to arrive. There was nothing unusual about that, she was always the last to appear, seeing as her house was the farthest away from their training ground.

"Here she comes," Shino said, breaking the silence. Kiba, who had been leaning against Akamaru, open his eyes and looked. She was coming all right, but there was something off about her. And by off, he meant the usual as of late. She was swaying back and forth, indicating that she had gotten little to no sleep the night before.

She approached them and smiled. Kiba and Shino did their best not to cringe at the sight of her. It didn't really matter how much concealer she put on, her sleepless night was clear as day on her face.

"Um, so shall we get to training then?" she smiled, fighting back a yawn.

"Hey, I think you should take the day off. You look a little tired," Kiba suggested. "Little tired" was a sad understatement.

"No you guys. I'm fine I really am, just having a little trouble sleeping, honest," she said.

"You've been having a hard time sleeping since we got home from the war. Are you sure you don't want to talk to someone?" Shino asked.

"No!" she yelled. She immediately regretted it, because she sounded way too defensive. Her teammates weren't stupid and they worried about her. But she didn't need to share her feelings or anything with them. She didn't need them thinking she was weak or incapable of taking care of herself.

"Are you sure you want to train?" Kiba asked. He studied her face, seeing if she really wanted to. Fortunately for her and unfortunately for them, she was a master when it came to masking her emotions and thoughts.

"Come on guys, please?" she pleaded. Her eyes went wide and her bottom lip began quivering. The two boys sighed. They had becoming immune to that look. But there was no denying her when she begged. They did, however, know that it was a terrible idea to allow her to train with them in this state.

Kiba groaned, "All right, you can train with us. But if we see you acting out of the ordinary, we're stopping immediately."

Hinata nodded, "All right Kiba-kun."

* * *

She didn't act all that out of the ordinary. She was able to focus, although it did bother the two others that she was training way too hard. It wasn't the usual "training to get stronger" kind. It was more of the "training to forget or keep your mind off of something" kind.

"All right Hinata, I think you've overexerted yourself enough. I think we should take a break," Shino commented as he watched Hinata on her knees, completely drained of chakra.

"Just one more go please?" she begged.

The two boys shook their heads, "No, you're completely drained of chakra. You might end up seriously hurting yourself or worse…"

"Just one more and then we can stop," she persisted. The boys sighed and shook their heads. They really didn't want to, but again she wasn't doing anything that they could prove to be out of the ordinary.

They let the weapons loose once more, and Hinata was once again ready to take them as she had been doing. But as she was about to activate the Byakugan, her mind drifted as she saw the weapons coming towards her. Her mind immediately twisted the image of the weapons to that of giant wooden splinters. The same ones that had nearly gotten her killed on the battlefield. The same ones that had cost her cousin his life. Her body went stiff and she found herself unable to move.

Kiba and Shino definitely noticed this and when they saw the weapons coming at her, her not moving, and the shocked fear in her eyes, they immediately sprang into action.

"Hey Hinata! HINATA!" Kiba yelled, but he was unable to snap her out of her trance. He cursed and ran towards her. The weapons were coming and just before they could shred her to bits, Kiba pushed her out of the way. They both went rolling and the weapons struck the ground she had been standing on just seconds before.

Hinata snapped out of it as she blinked and the scene of their training ground reappeared. Kiba was panting as Shino was rushing over to her. What had just happened?

Shino knelt down to look at her and saw that she was coming back to her senses. She began getting up, but very slowly. Kiba pushing her had resulted in her shoulder hurting quite a bit.

Kiba regained his breath and looked up at his teammate irritably. "Okay that's it. I don't know what's up with you, but are you trying to get yourself killed?"

Hinata blushed, embarrassed, "N-no I w-was just…"

"Okay Hinata, clearly you're not feeling up to training. And we already warned you that if you acted out of the ordinary, we would stop. And guess what? That little stunt just proved that you're not up to it today," he continued. Hinata averted her gaze to the ground, feeling ashamed.

"That's enough Kiba. And you Hinata, go home and get some rest. You don't look that well right now," Shino suggested, helping her get back up.

"But I'm f-," she tried to say, but was promptly cut off by Shino.

"No you aren't. Look, if you're more yourself tomorrow you can train with us, but until then, go get some rest."

Hinata looked around and saw an injured Kiba and weapons all over the place. She could've gotten herself killed.

She sighed and nodded her head. She turned and ran back towards the village, looking like she was going to cry.

"You were way too harsh Kiba," Shino commented.

"Well, she nearly got herself killed just now. On a move that she can do perfectly. After we told her not to push herself so much," Kiba shook his head.

"Still, you were too harsh," Shino said once again.

Kiba sighed, knowing that Shino was right. He'd apologize to her in a bit, but right now she needed her space.

* * *

Hinata didn't cry as she ran, but she was rather feeling ashamed of herself. How could she have been so careless? She could've hurt Kiba along with herself. But what bothered her more than anything was the fact that she had recreated that day on the battlefield. Up until now, they had only haunted her at night, but they had never crept up during her normal, everyday routine. That was beginning to scare her. The more the memories came back to plague her, the more depressed and out of control she felt.

She was so lost in thought, that she had not been paying attention to where she was going. Suddenly she felt her shoes catch on something. She began falling, but a pair of strong arms caught her before she could hit the ground.

She looked up from the corner of her eye and saw an all too familiar face. He looked worried.

"N-Naruto-kun!" she squealed. Now she had made a complete fool out of herself. In front of Naruto of all people!

"Woah! Hinata are you okay?" he asked. He looked at her with genuine concern. She slowly tried getting back and Naruto removed his arms.

"Y-yes!" she said quickly.

Luckily Naruto didn't notice that, instead he looked at her face, which looked very tired and worn out, "Training hard, I see!"

She blushed at his statement. Was that a compliment? She wasn't so sure, but she smiled, "Well I've been trying." She decided not to tell him about the little training fiasco she had had today.

"Yeah, so um I was wondering…"he brought his hand up to scratch the back of his head. He looked nervous. She gave him a strange look. He had never seemed so nervous in front of her.

"Y-yes Naruto-kun?" she asked, eager to hear what he had to ask.

"I, uh, was wondering, if you weren't busy tonight, if you'd want to get some ramen together," he stammered. He started kicking himself mentally. He had expected the question to go a lot smoother. After all, he hadn't been this nervous when he would ask Sakura out.

Hinata froze in place. Was he asking her on a date? She told herself mentally not to faint or anything. Those days were over. "L-like a d-date?"

Naruto laughed nervously, "If you want it to be."

Hinata smiled outwardly but inside she was dying. She'd been waiting for this moment since she'd met him. It was finally happening!

"O-of course!" she answered cheerfully. She wanted to punch herself because that sounded way too eager.

Luckily for her, Naruto didn't notice that, "Great! I'll pick you up from the Hyuuga Compound at 7 then?"

Hinata nodded her head. She thanked the heavens that her family now approved of Naruto, because that made going on a date much easier on her. She hoped that this little ramen date would hopefully develop into something more…

* * *

Hinata closed the door to her room, smiling. It was the first time in months that she had smiled a sincere smile. This was what she needed. Maybe it would help her heal from her other issues. But she shook her head. There was no need to get so hopeful. She looked at the clock and saw that it was only 1 in the afternoon.

She sighed as she lay back on her bed. Six more hours. But out of nowhere, for the first time in weeks, her eyelids began to grow heavy. She knew that a nap was coming upon her, so she grabbed her alarm clock and set it to 5:30. A nice nap after months of little to no sleep was definitely in order.

_**Hinata's Dream: **_

_Hinata stood in the middle of the battlefield. The smell of blood and death surrounded her as she looked around. She looked out in front of her as she saw Naruto looking up shocked at something. That's when she saw it. Giant wooden splinters were coming his way. Without so much as thinking she jumped in his way, hoping to intercept the deadly attack. But the pain she had expected never come, instead she looked up and saw one of the most horrific scenes she had ever scene. Neji had taken the blow. _

_She looked back at Naruto and wanted to scream at what she saw. He had somehow been run through too, she looked around. The bodies of her friends and family had all been impaled by the splinters. In fact, the entire alliance had been wiped out completely with this one blow. Only she was left standing…_

Hinata woke up screaming and panting. This was what she had been afraid of. Every time she could sleep, this was the nightmare that playedover and over since she got back. She looked over at the clock and saw that it was 5 o'clock. But she was in no mood to get up. She buried her face into her pillow and began sobbing. The realization dawned on her that these nightmares and feelings were here to stay. And she would be alone in her ordeal. No one could help her with this. The feeling of depression slowly crept up and grabbed her heart, refusing to let go…

* * *

**Please Review**

**Well that was chapter 1. Well, I guess you could say I like writing emotional stuff, and personally I like how this turned out, but my opinion hardly matters, as it is you the reader whose opinion matters. So here's the question: Should I continue? If yes, what do you think should happen next? Loved it? Hated it? Let me know! Plz R&R! Thanks! Til next time! **

**CherryXButterfly(Angel) **


	2. Trying to Forget

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters. **

**A/N 12/21/13: Well for one chapter, that was A LOT of follows and favorites. I guess I sold myself short. Ah well, well yes I'm glad that people like this new idea, so yes I shall continue this. Enjoy this next one! **

**Warning: Nothing just yet, other than Hinata's horrible PTSD.**

**Chapter 2: Trying to Forget**

* * *

She didn't know how long she'd been crying. She looked at the clock and saw that it was 5:45. Naruto wasn't going to pick her up in a little over an hour. She gently lifted her head off of the pillow, and her head was throbbing with a dull pain. Probably from crying for almost a straight hour. She looked in the mirror for a second. Her eyes were red and puffy and her face was still as pale as ever. Maybe a shower would do the trick.

She walked into her bathroom and stripped down. She sighed as she turned on the shower. The water was cold so she leaned against the wall, waiting for the water to heat up.

She sighed as the water heated up completely, and she stepped in. The water scalded her a little, but she didn't really pay attention to that. She was too lost in thought. Half of her was tingling with excitement, but the other half, the more dominant half was focused on the nightmares.

She really had no idea what was wrong with her. The more she thought about it, the more her head began to spin. Maybe this wasn't the best thing to be thinking right before the very first date with the man of her dreams. And she really wasn't trying to think about it. She was trying to think about what was about to happen in the next hour, but every time she seemed to forget, the more the nightmares and thoughts came back. Her mind was simply not allowing her to forget.

She pounded her right fist into the tiled walls as tears fell once again. There was something wrong with her, she just knew it. Never in her life had she felt more like a defective product. Plenty of shinobi had seen war. Every shinobi had seen battle. And every shinobi had definitely seen someone they love die. This wasn't a new concept. Everyone else had gone back to their normal lives. She was almost sure that whatever grief anyone had, they were channeling it positively.

"What's wrong with me?" she whispered as her tears continued to fall. She leaned up against the wall and began to slide down. She hugged her knees to her body as she let water cascade down on her.

* * *

Naruto literally felt as though he was going to pee in his pants. Decent bladder control was beginning to fail him as he was coming up to the Hyuuga compound. He had been down to the Yamanaka flower shop earlier and had gotten her flowers. That was thoughtful right? Was it too cliché? He had no idea. It was just a ramen date, so why was he getting so worked up? Ino had told him to get her red and white tulips since he didn't want to get some boring old roses. She didn't tell him why, but he took her word for it. He just hoped these told her how he felt about her.

The image of her came into his mind as he was getting worked up. Her innocent blush and smile and her hair blowing in the wind made him smile. And it was a giant goofy smile. He didn't know what was going on with him, but he liked it.

But as he came to the entrance of the Hyuuga compound, he realized just how nervous he was. Hinata was one thing, but her father was another. Naruto and Hiashi got along, but Naruto wasn't so sure about how he'd react to him dating his daughter. He shook the thoughts out of his head. For now, he just wanted to focus on tonight.

* * *

Hinata stared at herself in the mirror. She smiled slightly at herself in the mirror. She didn't look nearly as bad as she did an hour ago. Well outwardly anyway. Inwardly, she felt like she was going to curl up into a ball and die. It was a horrible feeling that she wished would just go away. She looked at the clock, and it was almost 7. He would be here any moment. She looked into the mirror one last time and put on the biggest, sweetest smile she could muster.

She left her room and began walking towards the entrance, when she saw her father coming. She froze and immediately began panicking. What was she supposed to tell him? The truth maybe? She wasn't sure if he'd be okay with it.

As she neared him, she could feel clammy moisture in the palm of her hands. He saw her and stopped in front of her, and examined her from head to toe.

"Are you going out?" he asked. His tone was cool, but not uninviting.

"I-I was j-just-,"she began stammering. A faint blush appeared on her cheeks. That gave him all that he needed to know.

"A date with the fox boy I see" he commented. Hinata stiffened, waiting to see her father's reaction. Would he be mad? She didn't think so.

"Y-yes," she answered in a quiet tone. She almost dreaded the next words that would leave his mouth.

She was expecting him to yell, to forbid her from going. It wasn't anything against Naruto personally, it was just the idea of her dating. From her experience, fathers weren't too keen on the idea of their daughters dating. However, she expected anything other than the reaction that she got.

He smiled slightly before saying, "Make sure he has you home by 11."

With that he continued walking, not even waiting to see the look of astonishment on his daughter's face. She only stayed like that for a second, before turning and walking towards the entrance.

Hiashi turned his slightly as he walked. He smiled slightly. As long as Naruto made her happy, he didn't object to his daughter seeing him. It had been months since he saw that blush and excitement on her face. He would remember to thank the boy for that later.

* * *

Naruto waited at the entrance fidgeting and thinking. And he cursed himself for it. It was a stupid ramen date. Okay he took that back. Ramen was never stupid, but it was just Hinata. A girl he'd known for years. He just needed to remember to breathe.

He heard footsteps and he turned and saw the Hyuuga girl walking towards him. He smiled his trademark grin and walked towards her. She looked a bit distracted, but she still smiled as he neared her.

He spoke first, "Um, hi!"

She blushed, "H-hi Naruto-kun."

He grinned even bigger and he held out the flowers. Hinata blushed as she saw the arrangement of white and red flowers. She smiled shyly as she took them.

"Th-thank you!" she stuttered.

"I hope you don't mind that they're not roses. I didn't think they were special enough for a special girl like you," he blurted out. He mentally kicked himself for that.

'_Too much Uzumaki, too much.' _

Hinata's blush intensified as the words left his lips. She just smiled at him and they began walking. Her mind at that moment was in chaos. She just wanted to pay attention to the part of her mind that screamed and squealed over what Naruto had just said. However, as always, the part of her mind that hid all of her darker feelings seemed to take over. She fought it off temporarily. She'd be damned if she let memories and feelings on the war interfered with this date.

They got to the ramen shop. The familiar sound of the bells jingling alerted Teuchi, the ramen shop man that someone was there.

"Ah, Naruto!" he said, and then he glanced at the young Hyuuga beside him.

"Hey old man! I'm on a date!" Naruto announced, grabbing Hinata's hand. She blushed even more so, and she had to tell herself to breathe so she wouldn't pass out.

"Ah, is that right?" he smiled at the girl, who smiled and nodded.

"Well that's great! Ramen's on me tonight then!" he said, laughing.

Naruto laughed and Hinata continued to smile and blush. They sat in their stools and waited as the ramen was being prepared. Naruto turned to her and smiled. He knew how shy she was, so he decided to initiate conversation.

"You look really pretty tonight," he complimented, hoping she'd answer back.

She blushed deeply but she realized that he was trying to get a conversation going so she spoke up, "Th-thank you Naruto-kun! You're looking amazing t-tonight too!"

Hinata was proud of herself. She was gradually starting to lose her stutter around him. Hopefully, if this became a usual thing, she would be able to forget about…she shook her head slightly as her mind was about to take a dark turn.

She looked and saw that the ramen had been served. Naruto was looking at her, refusing to start before her. She smiled slightly. He was such a gentleman.

Eating ramen only took five minutes, but there were small amounts of conversation. They talked about the mundane things, like how their day was. Hinata refrained from sharing the training fiasco, the sleepless nights, and the nightmares. No need to worry Naruto on the first date or turn him away from her.

"Thanks old man!" he called as he and Hinata departed from the shop. They decided that since they had a few hours, they'd walk around and talk. The only problem was that they were both so nervous that they hardly talked. Naruto had to strain himself to talk and so did Hinata. Hinata figured that as long as she kept conversation going, it would distract her from her thoughts, which were on the verge of breaking free.

"Hey, uhh Hinata?" Naruto whispered.

She turned to look at him. "Yes?"

"I, uh, have something I want to show you," he mumbled, but Hinata understood and nodded her head. He grabbed her hand and intertwined their fingers together. Hinata had to take deep breaths just to keep herself conscious. She didn't want to miss a single moment of this. He led her a little ways up the street before making a turn. The turn led to a cobblestone path. Hinata's eyes widened. This was definitely a place she'd never seen. The path led to a small orchard of trees. How no one in the village had noticed this beautiful place was beyond her. But she was snapped out of her musings when she heard the sounds of water in the distance.

Naruto stepped behind her and covered her eyes. He giggled a little. Hinata smiled, "Where are you taking me Naruto-kun?"

"Oh, just my secret place," he whispered in her ear. The warmth of his breath sent shivers down her spine. But she tried to stay as composed as possible.

"Just a second…NOW!" he announced as he removed his hands from her eyes. She gasped at the sight. It was a small little pond with a small waterfall cascading into it. The water was perfectly blue and she could see the bottom perfectly. Tears were forming. It was just that beautiful.

"H-how did you find this place?" she asked.

"Well, being shunned by the village had a few advantages, like being able to escape here. It always calmed me down," he laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head.

"It's so beautiful," she said in awe.

"Just like you," he mumbled quietly.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?" she asked, snapping out of her thoughts.

"Oh nothing, I was just talking to myself," he laughed again. "Anyway, this is my special place. Well, OUR special place now."

Hinata blushed at the change of the pronoun, but she looked at him and smiled. He smiled and patted his shoulder, signaling to her to rest her head there. She eagerly complied. She felt a lot of joy bubbling inside of her. Her heart practically leapt into her throat when he wrapped one arm around her. She closed her eyes, just wanting to relish this moment.

* * *

It was just a couple minutes after her curfew, but she knew that Hiashi wouldn't mind a few minutes.

"I had a great time," Naruto smiled as he looked into her eyes. Hinata blushed but smiled and nodded, indicating to him that she had too. So he continued. "I was wondering…"

Hinata smiled looking up at him, "The answer will probably be yes." She felt bold for saying that, but at the moment she really didn't care.

Naruto grinned real big, "So you'll be my girlfriend then."

It wasn't a question, and Hinata found herself smiling really, really big. She nodded her head. Naruto smiled, not a goofy grin, but a true sincere smile. He wrapped his arms around her waist and hugged her. She responded by wrapping her arms around his neck. They stayed like that for a few seconds. He pulled away slightly and looked at her face. He was too nervous to actually kiss her, but now that she was his, he'd take his time. Hinata looked at him, wondering what he'd do next. He leaned in and kissed the corner of her mouth. Hinata blushed and so did Naruto. He smiled and they broke apart.

"So, I'll see you tomorrow," he said, and Hinata nodded.

He began walking away, waving and smiling, and Hinata waved back. Soon he was out of sight, and she walked back into the compound with a dazed smile. This was as close to heaven as she had ever gotten.

'_**Don't get too comfortable or happy, it's not going to last,' **_her mind warned.

'_Why not? How do you know it's not going to last?' _she asked.

'_**Don't act stupid. Naruto just asked you out of nowhere? He always liked Sakura, probably still does. He's probably just with you because he feels bad that he got your cousin killed.' **_

'_N-no, that's not true! And no, he wasn't responsible for Neji nii-san's death!' _

'_**That's right. HE wasn't responsible. YOU were responsible.'**_

'_Stop! Stop! Why are you being so cruel! You're supposed to be my mind!' _

'_**Exactly! No one cares more for you than I do. So for your sanity, keep him at a distance. He's going to hurt you, because he just doesn't love you.'**_

'_You're wrong, please stop.' _

'_**Please, just remember the war Hinata, look what happens to the people close to you. It's better if you close yourself off. Put up walls Hinata.' **_

'_Stop, please just go away.' _

'_**Fine, I'll shut up now. But you'll see that I'm right…' **_

Hinata walked into her room and closed the door and pressed her back against the wall. Was her mind right? Was what it was telling her true? Should she put up walls? She didn't know, and she really didn't want to know. But the previous feeling of depression began to creep up on her again. And whether she knew it or not, the walls were slowly starting to go up…

* * *

**Please Review**

**He he he. Okay for those of you who are wondering: White Tulips mean purity and red Tulips mean love, so pure love. So yes they are finally together. But uhh yeah, for the sake of drama and angst, Hinata's mental state is going to have to tip some more. Well can't think of anything else to say! Loved it? Hated it? Let me know! Plz R&R! Thanks! Til next time! **

**CherryXButterfly(Angel)**


	3. Walls Up

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters. **

**A/N 12/27/13: Happy Birthday Hinata! I could literally kiss each and every one of you for all those favorites and follows. 20 follows and 12 favorites for just the last chapter! Thanks! Anyway enjoy this chapter! **

**Warning: Use of sleeping pills (not for attempting suicide)**

**Chapter 3: Walls Up**

* * *

She opened up the cabinet and looked at the bottle of sleeping pills. She needed to get some sleep and some peace of mind while she was at it. She had finally gotten everything she ever wanted, and her mind wasn't letting her enjoy it. And the more it spoke, the more doubts she began to have.

'_**Are you starting to see it?' **_

'_I don't see anything besides you trying to make me feel worse than I already do.' _

'_**I'm trying to protect you from getting hurt. And because I know you, I know you'll be happy if everyone around you is.' **_

'_Then why are you trying ruin tonight for me?'_

'_**Because everyone around you ends up hurt somehow. And also if Naruto hurts you, he'll hurt me too.' **_

'_Stop it. Naruto-kun won't hurt me.' _

'_**Yeah maybe not on purpose. Just keep the walls up Hinata…' **_

'_Can you please go away?' _

'_**Heh. You're already starting to believe me. So yes I'll go…for now.' **_

"STOP IT!" she screamed. She grabbed her head and slipped to her knees. She began sobbing, as she got into a fetal position. Her mind was screaming at her to close herself up, but she didn't want to. But at the same time, she didn't want people to get hurt either. She needed to get some sleep now. She got up and grabbed the bottle again. Two pills fell onto her hands. She just stared at them for a second.

'_**Trying to kill yourself Hinata?' **_

'_I thought I told you to go away!' _

'_**Probably for the best if you swallowed all the pills in the bottle…' **_

"SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP!" she screamed, this time loud enough to wake the whole compound. Without a second thought, she popped the pills and swallowed. She turned on the faucet and took some water and gulped it down.

That's when the tears came. Maybe her mind was trying to tell her something. Maybe she was hopeless. And before she knew it, she was in the shower, water turned up all the way, her clothes still on. She was crying so hard that her tears could be confused with the running water. And she was crying so hard, that she couldn't hear the pounding at her door. It was her sister, pounding tirelessly on the door.

"Hinata-nee, Hinata-nee?!" she kept yelling, but all she could hear was the sound of the shower water and her sister's sobs. She wasn't strong enough to break down the door, but she could definitely pick the lock. She looked around the room frantically, hoping to find something. She found a couple of pins and needles along with a few bobby pins. She grabbed one of the bobby pins and rushed over to the door. It took a few seconds, but before too long she was in the bathroom. The entire bathroom was filled with steam, and she gasped when she saw her older sister crying in the tub, the shower running on high heat, and she was fully clothed.

"Hinata-nee!" she screamed, running over to the shower and turning it off. Hinata didn't seem to notice because she kept sobbing, not even looking at her sister. Hanabi enveloped her arms around her sister, gently rocking her. That's when she bothered looking up.

"H-Hanabi-chan!" Hinata gasped, her cheeks turning red with embarrassment. Hanabi didn't deserve to see her like this.

"Hinata-nee, wh-what's happened to you?" Hanabi sniffled. She had started crying too.

"I-I was j-just," Hinata stuttered but trailed off. She had no idea how to answer the question. She didn't even know what was wrong with her.

"Shhh, it's all right," Hanabi said soothingly. Hearing that Hinata's cheeks turned even redder. Here she was, being comforted by her younger sister. Some older sister she was. It was supposed to be the other way around.

Hinata took her hand and wiped away her tears. Hanabi pulled away and looked at her sister confused.

"I'm sorry, I was just…missing okaasan," she lied. That worked right? That was believable.

Hanabi seemed to buy it as she gave her a sad smile. "Let me get some dry clothes. You'll catch a cold."

Hanabi walked out of the bathroom and came back a few minutes later. She saw Hinata dozing off, leaning against the wall.

"Hinata-nee!" Hanabi called to her, trying to get her attention. Hinata looked up. "I don't want you getting sick, so please change. Then you can sleep."

Hinata nodded her head. The pills were coming into effect, and she changed as fast as she could. She was beginning to doze off once again. Hanabi watched her sister sway as she made her way out of the bathroom. A few times times she almost fell over too. Hanabi walked behind her sister so that she could be able to catch her in case she collapsed.

Hinata plopped down on the bed, about to doze off. "Thank you Hanabi-chan…"

"Would you like me to stay?" Hanabi whispered, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"No that's all right, I'll be fine…" she mumbled. A few seconds later, Hanabi could hear her older sister's steady breathing, telling her that she was fast asleep.

Hanabi got up and made her way out of the room. Hanabi turned to look at Hinata one last time. She was so peaceful, something she hadn't seen in a while. If Hinata actually thought that Hanabi had actually bought the lie that she was weeping because she was missing their mother, then she was wrong. She had heard Hinata's screams and cries for the past few months now, but didn't know what to do until now. She would definitely have a word with her father in the morning…

* * *

Hinata opened her eyes at the first sight of sunrise. And she smiled slightly as she did. No dreams or nightmares. That was a good thing. But of course as with all medication, the moment she got up, she felt a bit of dizziness. Her mouth and throat were also extremely dry. She groaned a bit at this, but decided that if it kept the nightmares away, it was all worth it.

'_**So what, are you going to use them every night now?' **_

'_If I have to, then yes I will.' _

'_**Might as well take the bottle, put it to your lips, and drink the pills.' **_

'_Are you trying to kill me?' _

'_**No, I don't have to. You're already doing a decent job of that yourself.' **_

'_I'm not trying to kill myself…' _

'_**Maybe not trying…but you are. So keep people away from you. It'll keep them from feeling pain.' **_

'_But…I can't…' _

'_**Think about Neji…Do you want the same thing happening to Naruto?' **_

'_Happen to Naruto-kun?' _

'_**Yes, because he'd do the same for you. We both know you don't want that. Keep him at a distance…' **_

'_Keep…him at a distance?...' _

Hinata's mental battle was stopped when she heard a knock on the door. One of the servants had come to call her for breakfast. "Hinata-sama, Hiashi-sama requests your presence."

"Tell otousan I'm coming!" she called out. She walked into the bathroom, washed her face, quickly got dressed, and headed out of her room. She thought it was a little strange, because normally her father didn't have to request her presence. The only time that ever happened was if there was something urgent. There was nothing urgent…was there? She gulped, wondering if she was in trouble. She slid open the door and saw her father and Hanabi seated at the table. Hiashi was at the head of the table. She looked at the table and saw her favorites on the table. What was going on? Was today a special occasion? She hadn't made jonin as yet. It wasn't her birthday either.

Hiashi turned and looked at her. There was a warm smile on his face, which was rare.

"Hinata, please come and sit down," he motioned to the seat directly across from Hanabi. Hanabi greeted her with a warm smile too.

"W-what is this?" she asked.

"I just wanted to spend some time with my girls. Is that bad?" Hiashi smiled as Hinata blushed.

"I'm sorry otousan, I didn't mean…" she started but was silenced by Hiashi shaking his head.

"Come, I want to hear about last night," Hiashi said, switching the topic promptly. Lately, he had wanted to make the effort of spending as much time with his girls as he possibly could. Losing his nephew made him realize that.

"L-last night?" Hinata stammered.

"Yes, you went on a date with Naruto, did you not? Where'd he take you?" Hiashi inquired.

"Oh, you finally got that date with Naruto?" Hanabi asked, grinning.

"Y-yes," Hinata blushed. "He took me to get some ramen and then he took me to a special place."

"A special place?" Hiashi and Hanabi asked eagerly. Hinata gave them weird looks. It wasn't like them to take any interest in what she did and who she did them with.

"Y-yes, it w-was his special place," she didn't say anything more, indicating to them that it was somewhere private.

"So did anything else happen?" Hanabi asked eagerly.

"W-well h-he…" she stammered. This was really awkward to talk about in front of her father. She'd pictured him to be a little more begrudged about the whole thing.

"No need to be shy Hinata-nee!" Hanabi pressed on.

"H-he a-asked m-me to be his g-girlfriend," she stuttered out. "A-and I s-said yes."

There was a moment of silence. Hinata had never felt more like throwing up. The air around her was feeling extremely constrictive.

Finally it was Hiashi who broke the silence, "I see. Well if I have anything to say about it, it's that I think that that boy is good for you."

The breath Hinata held in was gradually let out. She was happy and sad to hear her father say that. Happy for the obvious reasons, but sad because the voice in her head was telling her to keep Naruto at a distance. She didn't want to. But she didn't want to keep him to get hurt either. Maybe keeping the walls up for a while was a good idea.

"Hinata? Hinata? Are you all right?" Hinata's train of though was interrupted by her father.

Hinata nodded her head and smiled, "I was just a little shocked is all."

A knock was heard at the door. Hiashi said, "Come in!"

The door slid open, "Someone's here for Hinata-sama."

Hinata turned around, "Who?"

The servant stepped aside and revealed the form of Tenten. Hinata looked confused. She and Tenten weren't particularly close, and they had never really trained together. Sure they'd fought side by side plenty of times, but other than that, their only common link was her cousin.

"Tenten?"

"Is she a friend of yours?" Hiashi asked looking up at the girl.

"Y-yes sort of. She was nii-san's teammate," Hinata said. Both Hinata and Tenten cringed slightly at the past tense.

"I'm sorry, was I interrupting something?" Tenten asked.

Hiashi looked at her and smiled, "No not at all. Would you like to join us?"

Tenten smiled back but shook her head, "Actually I came by to see if Hinata wanted to train with me today."

Hinata looked at her and smiled. That would be nice, "I would love to."

Hiashi nodded his head. "Well then you better be off then."

Hinata smiled at her father and her sister. She got up and bowed respectfully before getting up and leaving with Tenten.

Hiashi turned to Hanabi, "She seemed happy about the date."

Hanabi nodded her head, "But something is still wrong. She's been so off lately."

"I've noticed that too. Maybe if she left the compound more often and spent some time with that boy, she might be able to return to her normal self," Hiashi hoped.

"I'm still worried though. I've never seen her in that state before," Hanabi bit her lip, cringing at the memory of the night before.

"Let's just hope for her sake that you never have to see that again," Hiashi stated and Hanabi nodded her head…

* * *

Hinata and Tenten walked in silence. It was a little awkward, seeing as the girls hardly knew each other. Tenten was aware of how shy Hinata was, so she decided to break the ice. "So, how have you been?"

Hinata smiled gratefully, "Oh I've been good."

'_**Yeah not counting the incident in the bathroom last night…' **_

Hinata ignored it and continued to smile. "How have you been?"

Tenten smiled, "Oh same old same old. Training by myself since all Lee and Gai-sensei want to do is train by themselves.

Hinata gave her a sad smile. Tenten had always trained with Neji, helping him perfect his Byakugan and techniques. Now that he was gone, she was left to train on her own.

"Yeah, Kiba-kun and Shino-kun think I've been off lately, so they don't want me training with them until I can get my head on straight," she said softly.

"Yeah they told me," Tenten nodded her head. "They said you nearly got yourself killed during training yesterday."

Hinata turned red, "Wait?! They told you that!? Is that why you wanted to train with me?"

Tenten stared at her. She'd never seen the girl have an outburst like that. "Hinata relax. I just wanted to train."

"I-I'm s-sorry, I d-don't know what's gotten into me…"she looked away bashfully.

Tenten nodded her head and they continued on in silence.

* * *

Hinata was huffing and puffing, but she had managed to block all of the kunai and shuriken from flying at her. The best part was that she didn't have to same flashback that she did. She smiled.

Tenten was huffing, "Wow, that was great! You really got the Kaiten down. Your cousin would've been proud."

She smiled at this. She always loved hearing praise, though she was careful not to let it get to her head. "Th-thank you!"

"Let's take a break? We've been training for a long time," Tenten suggested and Hinata nodded her head.

"Hey Hinata!" the girls turned around to see a certain blonde haired shinobi with a goofy grin coming towards them.

"Oh Naruto?" Tenten asked. She looked confused.

"Oh Tenten! I didn't notice you here. I didn't know that you and Hinata were hanging out," Naruto grinned and turned to Hinata, who looked completely worn out.

"Woah! Someone's been training hard!" he grinned and Hinata beamed slightly.

"Hey I don't mean to sound rude, but don't you have your own training to do?" Tenten asked.

Naruto shrugged, "I finished up with my morning training. I was just taking a break. I was just wondering if Hinata was up to take a walk." He gently wrapped an arm around her shoulders as she blushed.

Tenten looked back and forth between them and then smiled, "So it finally happened huh? You two are finally an item. Why was I not informed?"

"W-well you see…" Hinata started to say, but Naruto cut in.

"We made it official last night," Naruto grinned, pulling her closer.

"Okay, but have her back soon! We still have some training to do!" Tenten laughed.

'_**Remember keep him at a distance. You don't want him to find out what happened last night after your date.' **_

'_That was mostly your fault!' _

'_**Yeah, but I'm that voice in your head. I know how you really feel.' **_

'_But he's my boyfriend…I can't just…'_

'_**Do you love him?' **_

'_O-of course I do!' _

'_**So keep a distance from him! You don't want him getting hurt because of you.' **_

'_I—You're confusing me! You tell me one thing and then you tell me something else!' _

'_**Do it for him and yourself! You're not right in the head and he'll eventually end up like Neji! I know you! That's what you're most afraid of! If you really love him, you need to keep him at a distance!' **_

Hinata's mental battle was killing her. She was afraid of that. Who wasn't? But her especially. Her mind was right. She loved Naruto, but at the same time she didn't want to let him go either. She had finally gotten him.

'_Okay, I'll keep him at a distance. And everyone too…until I can get over myself.' _

'_**Honey, that'll be never. Sorry…' **_

'_Maybe not…' _

Hinata looked at the ground as her and Naruto walked. Naruto was talking about his morning training, but Hinata was only half tuned in. Even though Naruto was right next to her, she couldn't help but feel worlds apart from him. Maybe that was a good thing. Because every time she found herself getting too close to him, images of the battlefield flashed before her. She needed to keep him away and close herself up. It was the only thing she could think to do. There was a pain in her chest, and she realized that it was her heart…

* * *

**Please Review **

**Hinata has a mean voice in her head. Or maybe that's just me. Yeah, I spent a lot of time researching depression, PTSD, and the effects of sleeping pills. Gradually my research will come to use. Anyway thanks for all of the love so far! What do you think should happen next? Loved it? Hated it? Let me know! Plz R&R! Thanks! Til next time! **

**CherryXButterfly(Angel) **


	4. Something's Wrong

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters. **

**A/N 12/31/13: Year-end update! Hmm, I think Naruto's been a clueless moron long enough. And for the record, Hinata is my favorite female character, so I'll never do anything to make her look horrible or weak. Anyway, enough chatter, back to the story. Enjoy! **

**Warning: A make out scene**

**Chapter 4: Something's Wrong**

* * *

Naruto and Hinata had been walking around for what seemed to be an eternity. It was silent for the most part. Naruto figured that it was because she was a little bit shy, but he really didn't understand why she was walking so distant from him. In fact it looked like she was intentionally trying to avoid him. He got nervous. Did he smell? No that couldn't be it. Was she scared? No, then why would she be going out with him in the first place?

He turned his head slightly and saw a change in her body language. Normally was nervous and timid, but not today. She just seemed distant.

"Uh hey Hinata?" Naruto asked. Hinata, who had been lost in thought, snapped out of it and slowly turned to him, not making eye contact.

"Y-yes Naruto-kun?"

Naruto took a better look at her. She seemed terrified. And she was staying as far away from him as she could. Her eyes were slightly downcast and she looked like she hadn't slept in weeks.

"Are you afraid of me?" Naruto asked.

Hinata gave him a confused look. Is that what he thought? That it was him that she was afraid of. "O-of course not!"

Naruto didn't buy it. "Then why won't you even look me in the eye? And why are you being so distant?"

Hinata bit her bottom lip. How was she supposed to answer that? She knew that if she told Naruto anything, he would just talk her out of her fears. He always did that. He had such a way with words. But as much as she wanted Naruto to talk her out of it, her mind played the same words over and over.

'_**Everyone close to you is doomed to the same fate. That is the price of being born to the Main House…' **_

"I'm sorry…I didn't realize…" she trailed off. Naruto huffed a bit.

"Hinata, look at me…" he demanded.

When she didn't, he grabbed her chin and forced her to look at him. When he looked at her white orbs, what he saw wasn't fear. It was something else. Something that he couldn't put his finger on.

Hinata immediately shifted her gaze after about ten seconds. She blushed furiously, but it wasn't from embarrassment. It was more like out of anxiety. Had he managed to figure it out?

"N-Naruto-kun?" she whispered as he just looked at her.

He stepped back for a second, which immediately sent Hinata into a panic? Did he figure it out? Did he think she was weak or unstable? Paranoia gripped her mind like nothing else as a full 30 seconds went by without Naruto doing anything.

But what he did managed to shock her just a bit. He smiled and extended his hand out. Hinata stared at his hand, unsure of what to do.

'_**Remember what I said about the people close to you?' **_

Hinata hesitated for a moment, but took Naruto's hand. Her mind was kicking her for doing that. She wanted to kick herself as well. She was supposed to be staying away from Naruto, and taking his hand would only weaken her resolve.

She didn't have time to let go of his hand as he started walking. He pulled her along too. They were still on the training grounds and there were trees all around them. They got to a secluded spot and Naruto stopped. He looked nervous about something. Hinata wasn't sure what to do. Naruto was never really one to get nervous.

"Naruto-kun?" she asked, placing a slightly shaking hand on his shoulder. Her mind screamed at her to let go of his shoulder and that it was a bad idea to have even taken a walk with him. She managed to shake them off for a while. Even if she didn't want to get too close to Naruto, a part of her still did. And right now…that side was winning.

Naruto slowly turned so that he was completely facing her. Hinata took her hand off of his shoulder and dropped her arms to her side. She didn't know what to expect.

However, when she felt his arms around her waist, pulling her in, that's when the confused look on her face changed to that of embarrassment.

She shyly looked into his eyes as he looked in hers. His eyes then travelled to her lips. He wondered if it was a good idea to kiss her right here, right now. She was his girlfriend and he was really not in any rush, but there was something he needed to know.

Slowly, he inched his face towards hers, and Hinata's eyes widened as she realized what was happening. Even as her mind screamed at her to pull away, she did nothing. His face was literally millimeters away and she felt clammy moisture in the palm of her hands.

Naruto, on the other hand, wanted to take this as slowly as possible. But being so close to her, he couldn't help himself. Within seconds, his lips pressed against hers softly. Minus the accidental times with Sasuke, this was his first kiss.

Hinata's eyes widened as she felt Naruto's lips pressed firmly against hers. What was she supposed to do? She'd never kissed anyone before. Her knees began buckling as she closed her eyes and returned the kiss.

Naruto smiled slightly into the kiss, as he tightened his hold around Hinata's waist. Hinata responded by snaking her arms around his neck. As a result, the kiss became even more passionate. Hinata had become a little too eager and parted her lips just a little bit. Naruto was surprised by her actions, but nevertheless knew what to do. He'd read enough of Icha Icha Paradise.

They didn't know how, but Hinata ended up backed up into a tree and Naruto pressed up against her. Hinata was in pure bliss. She'd dreamed about kissing Naruto for so long until…

'_**Think about your cousin…do you want Naruto to share a similar fate?' **_

Hinata's eyes popped wide open. She and Naruto were so close together, that one could assume that they were glued to each other. Her arms dropped from around his neck to his chest and she gently pushed him off.

Naruto looked at her confused. She blushed, "I-I really should be getting back to Tenten right now…" and without another word she dashed off.

She held back her tears. She'd finally gotten what she wanted from the person she'd always wanted. But she couldn't enjoy it because she was messed up, and now with that latest stunt she'd pulled, Naruto would know too.

'_**It was one slip up, but make sure it doesn't happen again…'**_

'_I-I won't…'_

Naruto, in the meantime, was left in confusion. But by the way she had initially responded to the kiss and also how she'd ended the kiss, it confirmed his earlier suspicions.

'_Yeah…something's definitely up…'_

* * *

Naruto walked around the village after he'd finished his training. He didn't try to find Hinata after today's events. He figured she needed some time to think, but their relationship couldn't continue like this. If something was wrong, he really needed to know.

He looked up and saw that Shino, Kiba, and Akamaru were walking down the same street as well. They were Hinata's teammates, and they probably had some idea right?

"Hey Kiba, Shino!" he called out to them. His voice was loud enough to catch the attention of everyone on that street. But Kiba and Shino didn't mind, as it was just Naruto.

"Oh hey!" Kiba called out, a grin covering his face.

"Naruto…" Shino nodded. He was glad that Naruto had acknowledged his presence this time.

Naruto ran over to them. He had a serious look on his face rather than the usual goofy grin. That was never a good sign.

"Hey, is something wrong?" Kiba looked at him nervously.

"Just a little worried about my girlfriend is all…" Naruto sighed.

Hearing Naruto use the words "my" and "girlfriend" together in the same sentence was shocking enough that they didn't hear the rest of it.

"Wait…when did you get a girlfriend?" Kiba inquired while scratching his head. "Did Sakura actually say yes?"

Oh, that's right. The two of them didn't know about him and Hinata. Well, now was a better time than never he supposed.

"Uh, no. I was talking about Hinata…" Naruto mumbled. It was coherent enough for both of them to understand, however.

"Wait, Hinata?! When did that happen?! And why didn't she tell us?!" Kiba barked.

Naruto let out an annoyed huff. As much as he'd like to talk about him and Hinata's relationship, the question of her safety and wellbeing was more important…

"It's kind of a long story…but I don't have time to tell you that right now. I just wanted to ask you guys if you've noticed anything weird about Hinata lately.

Kiba had not as yet recovered from the shock of Naruto's little bombshell, so it was Shino who had to answer. "Actually we have. She hasn't seemed like herself. She's been on edge and hasn't been sleeping much either. In fact, yesterday, she almost got herself killed during training. She practically froze up when we threw weapons at her. It was like she had gone into some sort of trance."

Kiba finally recovered from the shock, "Yeah. She didn't come to train with us either."

Naruto's eyebrows furrowed at the information he had gotten from Shino. So it wasn't him after all. There was something definitely off. "So I was right!"

Kiba and Shino gave him a quizzical look, but he ignored them.

"Yeah, that's because she was training with me," Tenten said, walking up behind them.

Kiba gave out a sigh of relief, "Well at least she wasn't off doing something stupid."

Naruto shot Kiba an annoyed look. Hinata may have been acting out of the ordinary, but she wasn't a little kid who needed to be watched all of the time.

"But it looks like you two were right. She's really out of it." Tenten sighed, shaking her head.

Naruto decided to speak at this point, "So is that why you trained with her today?"

"Yes and no. I needed someone to train with and Hinata's my friend. We may not be close, but I do care about her. Her mental state has been pretty out of whack," Tenten answered.

"Okay so then what do we do?" Kiba asked.

"I say we tell someone about this. We don't want it getting too far out of control," Shino recommended.

"Well I say we go up to the compound and ask her ourselves!" Naruto cut in.

"You baka, if she isn't willing to talk about it with you or any of us separately, what makes you think that she'll talk if all of us corner her? You know her; it'll just freak her out!" Kiba shook his head.

Naruto clenched his fist, "Then I'll get her to open up. She's my girlfriend. I'll get her to talk."

Tenten shook her head, "I don't think that we're going to get the answer out of her by talking to her."

The boys gave her a puzzled look. The question marks were quite visible over their heads. Naruto was interested to hear what she had in mind though. "Okay, so how do you think we should get the answer out of her?"

Tenten exhaled and shook her head. "We have to catch her off guard. Tomorrow I'll go over to the compound and see if I can find out?"

Naruto shook his head, "Then I'll go with you."

Tenten shook her head, "No, we don't want her getting suspicious."

"She's my girlfriend…"

"Yeah, but she's our friend. And we care about her just as much as you do!" Tenten snapped.

Naruto backed down but he let out an annoyed breath. He didn't like this. He didn't like it at all. But if Tenten was what it took to get the answer, it was worth it. Well, that's what he hoped anyway…

* * *

Hinata had opted out of dinner that evening. She wasn't really hungry. Partially from excitement, but mostly from nerves.

She had had her first kiss finally, but she worried if she'd still have Naruto as a boyfriend. She wanted to distance herself for his safety, but at the same time she didn't want to lose him either.

'_**That's quite selfish of you, you know…' **_

'_I don't want to lose him when I finally have him…' _

'_**So tell me then, how is it fair for him to have a girlfriend who shouldn't even be within 100 feet of him?' **_

'_W-what are you saying?' _

'_**You're not a stupid girl Hinata and I shouldn't have to spell it out for you. But I will anyway. Break up with him...' **_

Hinata gasped as her mind said the four dreadful words. Break up with him? No she couldn't…she wouldn't! She'd finally gotten him!

But at the same time, she loved him too much to let him be harmed. In fact, she loved all of her friends too much to let them be harmed. And every time she thought of the times with them, the moment her dreams and thoughts would twist them so that she would be forced to watch them die several times over on the battlefield of the Fourth Shinobi World War.

And the only way she could think to prevent that, was to keep them all at a distance. She didn't think she could stomach breaking up with Naruto though. But for his safety and well-being…she was willing to give up anything…even him.

* * *

**Please Review**

**DUN DUN DUUUUN! Yes, paranoia can do horrible, horrible things to a person. Especially when you're our favorite kunoichi. Don't worry, this story will still be NaruHina, and their relationship will continue to grow. But Hinata is going to have to suffer a bit more before she actually digs herself out. Also that little make out scene was not my best, so uhh show some mercy for that one. Have a Happy New Year everyone! Loved it? Hated it? Let me know! Plz R&R! Thanks! Til next time! **

**CherryXButterfly(Angel) **


	5. Giving In

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters. **

**A/N 1/4/14: Happy New Year! Well I can see that this story is doing well. I'm glad all of you like this. Again, I don't intend to do anything horrible to Hinata. Okay maybe a few things teenagers may do in the throes of angst and depression. I only put in elements that I have had experience with, so I refuse to put in anything I know nothing of. With that being said, let's proceed. Enjoy! **

**Warning: Use of alcohol **

**Chapter 5: Giving In**

* * *

Hinata had never felt so sick in her life. Maybe breaking into her clan's supply of sake wasn't the wisest idea…

_**Earlier that Night…**_

The voice in her head was torturing her mercilessly. It kept whispering to her to break up with Naruto. She wanted to keep him safe, she really did. But she didn't think she could actually do it.

'_**Don't be stupid…do you want…?' **_

'_Of course I don't want that! Stop acting like that's exactly what I want!' _

'_**Then why can't you just break it off!' **_

'_Why do YOU want me to end my relationship so bad? Naruto hasn't done anything to me!' _

'_**Not yet he hasn't. Look even if he continues this relationship with you unscathed, do you seriously think it'll last? He probably just feels close to you now because of what happened. And even if he does love you truly, do you think your father or your clan is seriously going to allow this?' **_

'_B-but otousan is perfectly okay with it. So is Hanabi-chan! If they are, the whole clan will be too.' _

'_**Come now Hinata, don't be stupid. Your father only accepts it now because of how you are now. Once you return to your normal self, he'll make sure it ends. Your little love story here will either end tragically or bitterly if you continue on with it.' **_

'_Can't you just leave me alone to have some peace and happiness?' _

'_**Honey, if you were having peace or happiness, I wouldn't be here. You're not at peace and you are definitely unhappy.' **_

'_Leave me alone then…' _

'_**No can do honey…you're stuck with me.' **_

'_Fine…if you won't go away, I'll make you!' _

'_**Yeah and how are you going to do that…?' **_

'_Watch me…' _

It felt a little strange for Hinata, that the only time when she would feel confident in a battle was when it was with the little voice in her head. Then again, how many normal people had active battles with their conscience? She really didn't know any in reality. In stories and movies yes, but never in reality. And even if they did, it couldn't be this cruel.

Everyone was eating dinner, which she had once again opted out of, this time by lying. So this was her chance to sneak around a little bit. The clan's main branch had a room where all of the alcohol was stored, and it was unlocked at night. Usually by the time the drinking started, the younger children had already gone off to bed.

She went on her tiptoes because in addition to having excellent eyes, most Hyuuga were blessed with hypersensitive hearing.

The room was filled with bottles of sake. Surely with that much, they wouldn't notice one bottle gone. Hinata reached out and grabbed the nearest bottle. But when she saw how small the bottle was, she decided that there was no way it would be enough. She grabbed 3 more.

'_**So you're going to drown me out with alcohol huh? Typical. You know this is how alcoholism gets started…' **_

'_You should've stayed quiet then.' _

'_**You'll only be hurting yourself…' **_

Hinata rushed, silently to her room. Dinner was probably ending right around now, and if her father caught her sneaking alcohol, there'd be hell to pay.

But before the voice could start tormenting and nagging her to death, she opened one of the bottles, and she didn't waste time with doubts before she started chugging it down. The liquid had a bitter taste to it, and it was strong. It kind of burned her throat and tears formed in her eyes. This stuff tasted horrible! Why did so many people enjoy drinking it?

But after a while, the disgust with the drink went away. A warm, soothing feeling washed over her and best of all, the voice had finally shut up. Everything seemed a little hazy as she went through the bottles. This was her first experience with alcohol, and she didn't really know what her limit was. So that's why she ended up passing out on her floor after two bottles…

* * *

Yeah, stealing sake was one of the worst ideas she'd ever had. When she had woken up, her head felt like someone had played Whack-A-Mole with it. Standing up was hell in itself, as the room immediately began spinning, and she had to put a hand over her mouth to keep herself from vomiting all over her room.

Running into the bathroom, she emptied all of the contents of her stomach into the toilet. Was this really worth it? A morning of misery for a night of peace? She didn't think too much, because the second she stopped vomiting, she passed out once more…

* * *

'Yeesh, security in this place…' Tenten shook her head. The Hyuuga had tight security understandably, but after being grilled mercilessly about her intentions, she was able to enter. That was yesterday. Today the guard just rolled his eyes and let her through.

This place was huge. She didn't know how anyone could roam through this labyrinth. But before she ran into a Hyuuga, she wanted to find Hinata's room as soon as possible. This place and the memory of a certain person were making her sad.

'I should've asked…'

She looked at the doors. They all looked the same to her until she came across one with a name on it. It was written on a gold plaque and it was Hinata's name. She smiled. That was lucky. But she wasn't surprised. From what Neji had told her in the early days of their team, they put the Main House on a ridiculously high pedestal.

The door wasn't locked and no one answered when she'd knocked, so she invited herself into the room. When Tenten entered the room, the smell of sake burned her nostrils.

She grabbed her nose and made a disgusted sound. Why the hell did Hinata's room smell like sake? She couldn't possibly have been drinking it…unless she was.

Tenten's eyes bulged when she saw two empty sake bottles on the bedroom floor. She had to be seeing wrong. Because Hinata didn't drink. None of them drank! She looked around a little more and saw that there were two unopened bottles on the dressing table.

Okay, if she knew Hinata even a little bit, she wasn't a pig. She had to be somewhere around if there were still empty sake bottles lying about. That's when she saw that the bathroom light was on with the door slightly cracked.

Tenten's eyebrows furrowed as she walked towards the bathroom. She didn't bother knocking, and she was glad that she didn't, because when she opened the door she saw that Hinata was passed out on the tiled floor.

"Hinata! Hey Hinata!" she cried out as she rushed over to the unconscious girl. Hinata didn't budge, so Tenten decided to shake her. Hinata stirred slightly but then when Tenten splashed water on her on her face, her eyes started to open. Tenten let out a sigh of relief, but the look on her face changed quickly.

Hinata, meanwhile, was trying to open her eyes, but the bright lights of the bathroom made it impossible to keep her eyes open. Her head hurt, her throat felt dry, and the sound of the bathroom exhaust sounded like a hurricane.

"Hinata…get up," a low, angry voice called out to her. It sounded like Tenten, but it sounded a million times louder than it was supposed to. Hinata groaned as she slowly opened her eyes again. The lights were blaring and the image of Tenten's cross face was the first thing she said. She tried getting up, but her head was pounding. Just as she was about to drop back on the ground, Tenten yanked her arm and made her sit up.

"T-Tenten?" she managed to whisper. Her throat was unbearably dry.

Tenten huffed and got a water canteen out of her bag. "Here."

Hinata took two giant gulps of water. Her throat still hurt, but she was able to talk now. "What a-are you d-doing here."

Tenten inhaled and exhaled deeply to keep herself from lashing out at the girl, "I was here to see you. Imagine my surprise when I found you passed out drunk."

Hinata's cheeks turned red immediately, "O-oh."

That's when Tenten got angry. "Oh? OH? That's really ALL you can say?"

Tenten's voice had shot up a couple of octaves, and it made Hinata want to stab her eardrums. "I-I'm sorry."

'_That was pathetic…' _

"Okay let's forget the fact that you blacked out last night. Tell me Hinata, why the hell are you drinking alcohol?"

Hinata turned red. Well this was her chance to tell someone. Hinata was about to open her mouth but then…

'_**Idiot girl! Don't tell Tenten anything!' **_

'_Why not? I'm tired of feeling like this all the time!' _

'_**Right, and you think Tenten can help you? You're beyond help.' **_

'_B-but….' _

'_**Just tell her you were experimenting and went too far. But don't drag someone else into your problems…' **_

"I-I was…" Hinata began.

Tenten cocked an eyebrow, waiting for the explanation, "I'm waiting…"

"Experimenting!" she said suddenly. "Yes! I was experimenting…a-and I must have had more than I could handle."

Tenten eyed her suspiciously. That was such a lie. "Now that we've gotten that little outburst out of the way, what's the real reason you got so hammered last night."

Hinata put on the most innocent face she could pull off, "I-I am telling you the truth."

Tenten sighed. As convincing as that look was, she wasn't one to fall for it. But because Hinata was already hungover and somewhat incoherent, she wasn't going to try and pry the answer from her now. But once she was back to full health, she would.

"It's clear that you're not up for training today. Just take some rest. I'll come by later to check up on you," Tenten shook her head. She picked up the bottles and tossed them in the bathroom trash can. Hinata saw her exit the room after giving her one last glance.

'_Happy?' _

'_**Of course. You should be too…' **_

'_I'm not.' _

'_**Sleep Hinata. Maybe some sleep will help you think straight…' **_

Hinata felt sick to her stomach. Partially because of the amount of alcohol she had consumed last night, but mostly because she was giving in. Her mind was controlling her, and every time it spoke, it seemed to have power over her. It made her feel like dirt, but she couldn't help but agree with it. It felt so wrong. But she felt like her mind was something she just couldn't escape. It had taken her hostage, and it was not going to let her go…

* * *

"SHE WAS DOING WHAT?!" Naruto screamed. The entire village had probably heard him.

Kiba didn't hit him over the head because he was just as outraged. "Hinata? No, you have to be lying. Hinata doesn't drink."

"I know what I saw Kiba. When I got there, she was passed out on the bathroom floor. Also there were two empty bottles on the floor and there were two unopened bottles on the floor," Tenten sighed.

"So what did you do?" Shino asked calmly.

"I haven't done anything yet. She's asleep right now and she will be for a while. But if you ask me, I think we should tell her father," Tenten suggested.

"What if she really was experimenting?" Kiba urged.

Naruto shot him an annoyed look, "You actually believed that? Even I don't buy that."

Kiba shot back the same look, "Of course it's hard to believe, but what if there's a small possibility that she's actually telling the truth."

Tenten shook her head, "Even so, a little experimentation can lead to a huge problem. I think that we should tell her father. He has more power than us…"

Naruto nodded his head, "Yeah, and I think I should be the one to tell him too."

Tenten, Kiba, and Shino stared at him.

"I think Tenten should be the one to…" Shino began, but went silent when Naruto furiously shook his head.

"I'm her boyfriend. Also, I want to talk to her."

"We'll go with you then," Kiba offered.

Naruto shook his head. "No, I need to go. I need to be the one to let him know. Plus there are a few other things…"

"Like?" Tenten asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Things. Look, just let me go please. She's my girlfriend, and it is my job to take care of her."

The three looked at each other skeptically. But then they remembered that Naruto had a way with words. After all, he managed to turn even the worst of enemies into allies.

"Okay fine. But we want to know everything when you get back," Kiba growled.

Naruto nodded his head. He then turned and looked towards the compound. He was nervous, but he felt there was more wrong with Hinata then just drinking and not sleeping. And he had a feeling that he knew what it was…

* * *

**Please Review **

**Okay poll for the next chapter! Option with the most votes gets put in! **

**A) Naruto tells Hiashi, but Hinata comes and takes control of the issue so it dies down. **

**B) Hinata stops Naruto from telling anyone anything and he tries to get it out of her. **

**Yeah, no NaruHina moments in this chapter, but the next chapter will be NaruHina heavy. As for the incident with the alcohol and passing, that was from first and secondhand experience. Never try it. Loved it? Hated it? Let me know! Plz R&R! Thanks! Til next time! **

**CherryXButterfly(Angel) **


	6. Just Tell Me

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters. **

**A/N 1/8/14: Polls are a great idea as I have seen. I will make it a point to do it for every chapter, or most chapters. Well, here are the results from last chapter's poll! (: **

**Option A: 0 **

**Option B: 9**

**Well I think Option B won! I had a feeling that would happen. I want to make the story a bit longer, so let's see what happens. Enjoy! (; **

**Warning: A more detailed make out scene, but nothing too bad. **

**Chapter 6: Just Tell Me**

* * *

Naruto had never actually been inside of the Hyuuga compound. He'd walked by it, he'd been outside of it waiting for Hinata, and he had peaked inside. But never had he actually been inside of it. It was bigger than it looked.

And now that people no longer looked at him with disgust or fear, he was welcome pretty much everywhere. Every Hyuuga that walked by bowed respectfully and a couple of the young girls giggled when they saw him. It made him grin, but his mind was as far from the attention as it could be at the moment.

'_Damn, where the heck is Hiashi? They should really put labels on all of these doors.' _

Now what was he going to do? Should he just tell Hiashi that Hinata was drinking? No, he'd have to work his way to that. He didn't want to just blab. He didn't even know how Hinata's father would see him. Did he even know that they were dating?

'_Keep calm, just keep calm.' _

Should he talk to Hinata first? He was sure that Tenten wasn't lying about what she saw, but maybe he should talk to Hinata first? He didn't know. Damn, he should've thought this through a little more. Well he was here now; he'd have to play it by ear.

* * *

Hinata's head was pounding when she woke up. Killing her conscience with alcohol was not worth the physical consequences. The light streaming in from the windows burned her eyes, and her hearing was still hypersensitive. Maybe some medication would help the hangover.

She reluctantly crawled out of her bed and slowly made her way to the bathroom. She couldn't move her head, as it felt heavy, like a boulder was sitting on top of it. She opened up her cabinet and found a bottle of aspirin and swallowed a couple of pills. It would be a few hours before her head stopped pounding. Well, she had absolutely nothing to do today as Tenten had excused her from training today. Great, she'd be bored all day.

She was in nothing but pajama bottoms and a tank top, but she didn't care. This was her family, and she didn't feel well enough to leave her room in decent clothing.

She needed to eat something quick. She had practically thrown up everything she had eaten the day before. No more late night binges for her ever again, well unless the voice in her head bothered her some more.

Besides the obvious physical symptoms, her mood was worse than ever. Maybe it was a side-effect of drinking too much, but whatever feelings she had before were only amplified by the alcohol. She had never felt more like crying in her life.

'_**Told ya not to drink.' **_

'_I'm sorry, I should've listened…' _

'_**If you listened to me more, your life would be much better.'**_

'_Maybe, last night did prove that you could be right at times…' _

'_**I'm right all of the time honey. Now will you promise to do what I say…?'**_

'_No…' _

'_**No? You just admitted that I was right.' **_

'_Yes, this time.' _

'_**I'm right about everything else too. Oh do you sense that? It's your boyfriend's chakra. You know what to do…' **_

The voice was right, that was Naruto's chakra. But why was he here? Was he here to see her? No, she couldn't let him see her like this!

She was so lost in thought that she didn't hear the footsteps coming up behind her. And she definitely jumped when she felt a warm hand on her shoulder.

She spun around; she regretted doing that as her head felt like it was going to roll of off her shoulders. But she got over it quickly when she saw Naruto's face. She blushed.

"N—Naruto-kun?!"

Naruto looked at her from head to toe. She looked worse than Tsunade after one of her binges. But her appearance confirmed what Tenten had told him. She was wearing a revealing tank top too, but he decided to not look down for the time being.

"Hinata! You don't look so good," Naruto commented and Hinata flushed. Of course she didn't, she was hungover.

"I—I—uh what are you doing here, Naruto-kun?" she asked, biting down on her lip.

Naruto thought for a second, "I—uh came to talk to your father."

Hinata froze. Her father? Why did he want to talk to her father? What did he know? Had he noticed her behavior? Had Tenten told him everything? No, she needed to calm down. She was becoming increasingly paranoid.

Naruto sighed. Should he tell her about his concern? He didn't know. He'd never actually been in a relationship before.

"I just wanted to thank him for stuff…" Naruto lied. He was a terrible liar, and Hinata knew it.

"You're lying," she whispered.

Naruto looked around everywhere except into her eyes, "No, but can I please see your father? This is important."

"What's it about Naruto-kun?" she asked again, this time a little more assertive.

"I—It's about you…I don't think you've been completely honest with me," Naruto answered.

"W—what do you mean?" Hinata blinked, internally panicking. Naruto was definitely suspecting something.

"I think you know what I'm talking about Hinata. Tenten told me everything about last night," he answered, a hint of anger and concern in his tone.

'_**That damn Tenten! Why couldn't she just leave well enough alone! All right Hinata, do whatever you have to! Keep Naruto silent about this! Do whatever! Seduce him even! Just make sure he doesn't blab! And then if he asks why, blow it off!' **_

'_But y—you said t—to keep away from Naruto-kun!' _

'_**Treat this like a mission! Now do it!' **_

Hinata didn't bother protesting, but she did look at Naruto. "Naruto-kun, I—I was just experimenting."

Naruto shook his head, "You're a terrible liar."

"Naruto, come with me please?" Hinata asked, but Naruto shook his head.

"I need to talk to your father."

"Otousan and Hanabi-chan are away at the moment! They won't be back for another few days!" Hinata lied quickly. She prayed to the heavens that he bought it. She tried to make the lie as convincing as possible.

Naruto's face changed to that of annoyance, indicating to Hinata that he believed her. The panic that she had felt previously began to dissipate and a bit of relief washed over her. Well, now all she had to do was ensure that he didn't tell anyone else either.

"Okay, yeah, you and I need to talk," he agreed.

Hinata gulped a little bit. She wanted to talk about everything but last night's incident. Obviously no one believed her story, so she had to think fast. She didn't want Naruto to know that the war still affected her. She didn't want to look pathetic or weak in front of the one she loved.

"Let's go to my room then…" she whispered and Naruto nodded. Hinata wasn't allowed to have boys in her room, unless it was a servant or her father. When he was alive, Neji had restricted access to her room. So if her father found out about this, he'd kill Naruto for sure. But her father was busy at the moment, and he rarely came to her room, so she was fine…for now.

Naruto walked into the room and could smell the sake all over the room. He didn't like the smell of sake much, but he had gotten used to it over the years. To think that Hinata was drinking this stuff made him cringe just a bit.

"Just experimenting huh?" Naruto said, looking at the two bottles on the dressing table.

"…Um, well I did go a little overboard last night," Hinata laughed nervously.

"A little overboard?" Naruto raised an eyebrow.

"…" she didn't know how to answer that.

"Hinata…sit down," he sighed, sitting down on the bed and patting the spot next to him. Hinata blushed faintly before taking the spot next to him. She didn't look at him.

"Hinata, I need to know, and I want the truth," Naruto started, and Hinata looked at him from the corner of her eye.

"Y—yes?"

"What's up with you? You seem so much more distant. I want to be with you I really do, but it just doesn't seem like you want the same," Naruto finished.

"It's just…I haven't been myself," she answered, but she trailed off on the last part so that Naruto couldn't understand what she had said.

"No Hinata, it's not just with me, it's with everyone. You aren't yourself. And now you're drinking too! Please tell me what's wrong, I promise I won't be mad, but please talk to me!" Naruto begged, and Hinata bit her lip so that she wouldn't cry. But it hardly worked, as the tears slowly started to flow.

"Things have been difficult for me Naruto-kun," she confessed, looking down at her hands. She really didn't want him to see her cry.

"Don't be afraid to tell me, what's going on?" he whispered, rubbing her back soothingly.

Normally that would have made Hinata feel worlds better, but right now it made her feel guilty. How could she even think of distancing herself from a person like him? She had to tell him, she just had to.

'_**Don't even think about it!' **_

'_No I have to!' _

'_**He'll just break your heart over it!' **_

'_Then let him! Nothing he will ever do will get me to stop loving him!' _

She didn't stop to listen to her mind screaming at her. She turned to Naruto and looked at him. "E—ever since we came back from war, I've just been feeling a little sad."

Hinata decided to downplay her feelings. Naruto was already worried about her, but she didn't want to scare him in anyway. She knew now that Naruto would never leave her or see her as weak, but still…there was that fear that was rooted in her mind.

Naruto had had a feeling that her feelings were connected to the war. He was there when her cousin had been killed, and he'd always feel guilty about it. He wrapped his arms around her. "Then why didn't you tell me that?"

"B—because I didn't think it would last this long," she whispered, tears streaming down her face. She wanted to tell him the truth. She wanted to tell him about the nightmares, the voice in her head, the flashbacks, and the depression, everything…

Naruto felt guilty for being so angry before. "Hey, come here," he whispered.

Hinata scooted closer to him and wrapped her arms around him. Unlike before, she felt secure in his arms. She still felt guilt for not telling him the complete truth.

"Hey, Hinata about yesterday…" he started, but Hinata silenced him with her finger.

Hinata shook her head, "If you're referring to the kiss, then it was my first."

Naruto gave her a shocked look. He looked at her from top to bottom, wondering how such a beautiful girl had never been kissed before yesterday, "A—are you serious?"

Hinata giggled and nodded her head, but then put on an apologetic face, "Naruto-kun, I'm sorry about walking away yesterday. I should've…"

Naruto shook his head, "Don't be." And then he smiled, "We still have a lot more chances."

Hinata smiled back, "You mean like now?"

Naruto's eyes widened at Hinata's boldness, "Now?"

Hinata nodded her head as she moved onto his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Are you sure? I mean we don't have to right now, especially after that conversation…"

Hinata shook her head, "Naruto-kun, let me make it up to you?"

"But if someone walks in?" he said, unsure.

"No one will walk in," she reassured and Naruto smiled. His arms rested on her waist and he softly pressed his lips on hers.

Hinata returned the kiss and for a few moments their lips moved slowly, but Hinata grew impatient and pressed up against him. Naruto seemed surprised by her actions, but eagerly complied. Hinata parted her lips slightly, and Naruto slid his tongue in. As their tongues danced around, Naruto's right hand played with the hem of her tank top. Hinata blushed, but she responded by bringing a hand down to the collar of his jacket and tugging the zipper all the way down. If someone were to walk in and see this, they'd both be in monumental trouble, but they were too swept up in the moment.

Naruto grew frustrated with just playing with the edge of her shirt, so he slowly, but gently slid his hand inside of her shirt. Hinata gasped softly when she felt his calloused hands against her soft skin. Without breaking apart, Hinata removed Naruto's jacket and revealed his mesh top. Naruto's hand only kept inching up, and Hinata grew impatient. She was about to grab his hand and move it to her breast, but that's when she heard a tap at her locked door.

Naruto and Hinata jumped apart. He gave her a panicked look but she reassured him. "Hide in the bathroom! I'll see what they want!"

Naruto nodded and quickly but quietly bolted into the bathroom. Hinata fixed her clothing and answered the door.

"Y—yes?" she asked, seeing the servant.

"I hear you are not well. Would you like something to eat?" the servant asked politely.

Hinata smiled and shook her head, "No not at the moment. I just need some rest. I'll call you if I need something."

The servant nodded her head and turned to walk away. Hinata closed the door and locked it. She sighed in relief before whispering, "Naruto-kun she's gone."

Naruto walked out of the bathroom and smiled. She was about to run to him and pounce on him again but he said, "Hinata, I think we should wait before going that far. I don't want to rush."

At first Hinata was a little disappointed as she loved the feeling of Naruto being close to her. But then she smiled, realizing that Naruto wanted to wait. From what she had heard from the other girls, most men would have just jumped at the opportunity, but not Naruto.

"Stay with me for a bit longer then?" Hinata requested. Naruto nodded his head and smiled, holding a hand out. Hinata walked over and took it. They lay back on the bed together and he wrapped his arms around her.

Hinata had never so safe or secure in her life. But whatever it was, she didn't bother to think about it. Her head was still screaming at her to stop it, but she ignored it. The voice may have been right about many things, but not this. Not Naruto. And before the horrible nightmares and flashbacks came back, she wanted to enjoy some peace here with the man she loved…

* * *

**Please Review **

**Poll for the next chapter **

**A) The whole chapter is a break from the voices and the nightmares, completely NaruHina, but they come back with a vengeance the chapter after with a vengeance.**

**B) Naruto and Hinata have only part of the chapter for happiness before the nightmares and voice attack and Hinata returns to her depressed state even worse than before. **

**Okay I decided that after making Hinata suffer chapter after chapter, I would end the chapter on a happier note. Poor girl deserves some peace and happiness after making her suffer chapter after chapter. Remember let me know in your review! Your options are listed! Loved it? Hated it? Let me know! Plz R&R! Thanks! Til next time! **

**CherryXButterfly(Angel) **


	7. A Little Bit of Joy

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters. **

**A/N 1/11/14: Apologies for wording the last poll all weird. Never again will I wait until 2:30 in the morning to write a poll. But here are the results! **

**Option A: 3**

**Option B: 7**

**I think B won this one. You guys are cruel aren't ya? Haha, I actually expected A to win, but I guess it makes for a good story for Hinata to suffer a bit more. Yeah, I'll go easy on her this chapter, but the first half of the chapter will be happy. Enjoy! **

**Warning: Nightmares in the second half and a little fluff in the first half. **

**Chapter 7: A Little Bit of Joy**

* * *

Hinata was cuddled up to Naruto for what seemed like hours. He said he'd stay for only a little bit, but wound up staying the rest of the morning. He had to train, but he was feeling way too comfortable to move. But sadly, he couldn't stay forever.

"I have to train," he whispered in her ear.

"Noooo!" Hinata whined, wrapping her arms around him even tighter.

Naruto smiled. It was nice to feel wanted. "I don't want to go, but I do have to train. I still have to become Hokage one day, don't I?"

Hinata nodded, but she still didn't let go. A few minutes wouldn't kill him would it?

"Come on Hinata, I really have to go," he said gently, gently pushing her away.

Hinata dropped her arms reluctantly and sat up. One of her tank top straps slid down her arm and her hair was messy. Naruto had never bothered putting his jacket back on after their make out session, so if her father walked in, he would probably get the wrong idea.

"Wait," Naruto said, propping up on his elbows and grabbing one of her wrists. She turned around and Naruto captured her lips. He pulled her closer by grabbing the back of her head. She was a bit surprised by the intensity of the kiss, but nonetheless kissed back. The kiss didn't last long, because Naruto pulled back after a few seconds.

Hinata smiled and handed him his jacket. He smiled, sat up, and grabbed the jacket. As he was putting the jacket on, he looked up at his girlfriend.

"Hey Hinata, before I leave, I need you to promise me something," he whispered.

Hinata nodded her head and waited for him to say it.

"Will you promise not to go on any more drink because of this? Will you promise that if something's wrong that you'll come and talk to me?" he asked.

Hinata bit her lip, but nodded her head because the request wasn't ridiculous. "O—of course I will!"

Naruto smiled and gave her a quick peck on the lips. "Good. Oh and by the way, meet me at our special place tonight. Bring a bathing suit."

Hinata blushed, "O—okay. But why a bathing suit?"

Naruto chuckled and gently kissed her cheek, "We're going swimming."

Hinata's face turned bright red. The only bathing suit she had was a bikini. "O—oh, all right."

Naruto could see how nervous she was so he kissed her forehead, "Don't worry. I'm not going to take advantage of you or anything."

Hinata nodded her head. But they both jumped when they heard voices outside of her door. There was no way she'd get away with Naruto walking out of her room, so she turned to the window.

"Naruto-kun, get out through the window. No one will see you," she said pointing to the window.

Naruto nodded his head and finished zipping up his jacket. Hinata walked over to the window and opened it all the way so Naruto could easily slip through it.

"All right see you tonight!" Naruto said quietly, kissing her softly and stealthily slipped through the window.

Hinata smiled as she watched him disappear. She pressed her back against the window and grinned. Needless to say, she was more than excited for tonight.

* * *

Naruto smiled as he walked towards the training grounds. He'd probably have a hard time training, thinking of tonight.

"Hey Naruto!" Naruto was snapped out of his thoughts by Kiba's loud voice. He scowled a bit as he turned to see Kiba, Shino, and Tenten walking towards him.

"Oh, hey you guys," he mumbled, annoyed that they had taken him out of his happy thoughts.

"We were worried when you disappeared this morning and never came back. We were about to head over the compound ourselves," Tenten said. Naruto looked fine though. He looked more than just fine in fact.

"Oh yeah, I was with Hinata…" he said, but trailed off, a hint of red tinting his cheeks.

Kiba didn't seem to notice like the other two did so he was the one who ended up asking, "So was she really just experimenting? Or…?"

Naruto sighed, "Turns out Tenten was right, there was something bothering her."

"Oh?"Tenten inched closer.

Naruto nodded, "Turns out, she's just been sad since the war ended. She was using the alcohol to deal with it."

Tenten looked skeptical, "That's all? She's just sad? Did she say why she was sad?"

Naruto shook his head, "I didn't want to push her to tell me. She had a hard time telling me that she was sad."

"But that doesn't make sense. I'm sure she's been sad before. But that usually doesn't lead a person to drink," Tenten argued.

Naruto let out an annoyed sigh, "Yeah, you must know these things because clearly you're a therapist."

Tenten narrowed her eyes, "Don't be a sarcastic asshole. Excuse me if I don't believe that it's ordinary sadness."

"Well Tenten, she did lose her cousin," Kiba pointed out.

Tenten huffed, "And I lost my teammate and best friend. You don't see me downing bottles of sake. Look I think it goes beyond just her being sad about losing Neji to the war."

Naruto thought about it for a second. Tenten did have a point. But at the same time she didn't feel the guilt that Hinata probably did. "You know…that makes sense."

Tenten nodded her head and then Shino spoke up, "So how do we get her to talk to us?"

The three looked at each other and then at Naruto to see if he had any ideas. Turns out that he actually did. "Well, I was taking her out tonight."

"Oh, where to?" Tenten asked. "And make sure it's private, she's more likely to reveal stuff to you that way."

"Well, I was taking her for a midnight swim," Naruto started. The others shook their heads. "What's wrong?"

"You do realize that we're in the middle of January right?" Tenten asked making sure Naruto hadn't completely lost his mind.

"Yeah so? The water's going to be warm and comfortable," Naruto answered.

"And this isn't just some excuse to see Hinata in a bikini is it?" Kiba asked. If it wasn't clear already, Kiba was extremely protective of Hinata and her dignity.

Naruto shook his head furiously, "I'd never take advantage of her like that. But I do want her to open up to me more. Is that such a bad thing?"

Shino cocked his head to the side to examine Naruto's face, "He doesn't seem to be lying."

The other two did the same and nodded their heads but it was Kiba who spoke up, "All right, if she does open up to you, then you'll tell us right?"

Naruto thought about it for a second, "If it's nothing too serious than I don't think I'll have to. But if it's really serious, you'll be the first to know."

Tenten shook her head, "No matter what it is, we would like to know. But we can't get her help until and unless we know what it is."

Naruto nodded his head, "All right you guys. I'll catch you guys tomorrow then. I have some training to get back to."

Everyone nodded their heads and all headed in different directions, but all of their thoughts were focused on one person.

* * *

Hinata stared at herself in the mirror. It had been a while since she'd been swimming. And it had definitely been a while since she'd worn a bikini. Her face turned bright red when she saw her body in the mirror. Her body was nicely shaped and had curves in all of the right places, but that was the embarrassing part. She didn't like showing off what she had. She was huge on modesty. But this was Naruto. Oh that made it all the worse. What would he think when he saw her? He'd spent so much time chasing after Sakura, who barely had any curves at all.

She'd spent so much time trying to get comfortable in her bikini that she'd forgotten to lock the door. And that's why she jumped when she heard the door open.

"Hinata-nee, otousan requests your presence for d-," Hanabi said as she walked in but froze when she saw her scantily clad sister. Her jaw dropped.

"Hanabi-chan! You sh—should've knocked!" Hinata was flustered and instantly turned around, even though that didn't help.

"H—Hinata-nee, why are you in a bikini?" Hanabi gasped, her eyes were still glued to the thin fabric that kept her sister from being completely naked.

"I—I w—well, y—you s—see," Hinata stuttered.

The shock faded and Hanabi folded her arms, waiting for an explanation. "Yes? I thought you were sick."

"I—I was this morning. B—but I have a d—date tonight," Hinata answered.

Hanabi arched an eyebrow. Even if she was only 11, she wasn't stupid enough to believe that it was just a date. "In a bikini?"

"W—well w—we were going swimming," she mumbled.

"Swimming? In the middle of January? Just the two of you?" Hanabi gasped.

"It's not what you think!" she said quickly.

"Otousan wouldn't let you…" Hanabi reminded.

"Well, he doesn't have to know…" Hinata said.

Hanabi gasped, "You're sneaking out?"

Hinata nodded her head. "Well no, but I probably won't be home until late."

"And do you want me to cover for you?" Hanabi asked. She didn't seem thrilled about the prospect, and she looked a little scared.

"No, I don't need you to do that. I'll just tell otousan that I have a date tonight," Hinata shrugged, putting her pants and mesh top on. "It wouldn't be a lie."

Hanabi shrugged, "Well if you come back with your virginity intact, then we won't have a problem."

Hinata's face turned bright red once again. Why was her 11 year old sister so aware of those kinds of things? "Hanabi-chan!"

Hanabi giggled a little, but her face became serious, "Are you going to be all right? Especially after…"

"Hanabi-chan, I'll be fine. Don't worry," Hinata smiled. "Now let's go for dinner."

Hanabi nodded her head. But somehow, she felt like she couldn't trust her sister's words at all…

* * *

Naruto had grabbed a quick bite after training. And by quick bite, he chowed down on about 3 bowls of ramen. That was probably a bad idea since he was going swimming. But the water was only what, 3 feet? It was too shallow to get any real swimming done.

Should he buy a pair of swim trunks? Nah, he was perfectly fine swimming in his boxers.

After finishing up with his last bowl of ramen, he headed towards his special place. Well his and Hinata's special place now. He wondered if she was already there. She probably was; it was 9:30 in the evening. He was a little nervous. Not only about the fact that he wanted Hinata to open up more to him tonight, but because he was about to see her in a bathing suit. He may have been trying to be gentleman, but what could he do? He was a man and he had desires. Well he could control himself as long as she wanted him to.

He walked through the trees. He looked and saw the winter breeze blow through the leaves. It was cold tonight, but luckily the water was nice and warm. He turned a corner and saw Hinata sitting on a boulder in front of the water. She'd taken her pants off but had kept her jacket on. She was wading. Naruto smiled, she looked absolutely beautiful.

"Hey," he said, coming up behind her. She turned a little and smiled.

"H—hey," she smiled, not moving from her seat. He was fine with that. He was just fine watching her wade.

Naruto zipped down his jacket and took off the mesh top. Hinata blushed as she watched him strip. Over the last few months, Naruto had developed a well-built body. He kicked off his pants and waded into the water. The water only reached his waist and he turned around and looked at the blushing girl in front of him.

"Come on in! The water's great!" he encouraged, laughing.

Hinata nodded her head shyly as she waded in the water, removing her usual jacket, revealing her figure to the man in front of her. Naruto had to remember to breathe as she waded towards him.

He held his arms out and she waded right into them. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he led them into deeper water.

"The water's warm," Hinata whispered, smiling.

"Heh, yeah it is. That's why I asked you to come here," he said, pulling her closer.

Though she was still shy and awkward around him, she was starting to get used to him, and she was starting to feel a lot more comfortable around him. But it still shocked Naruto, when she pecked him on the lips.

"So where were we this morning?" Hinata mumbled against his lips. Naruto's eyes widened. So that's what she wanted, huh?

"Are you sure?" Naruto asked.

"Of course. Well as long as we don't get too far," she answered .

Naruto nodded and recaptured her lips and wrapping his arms even tighter around her. Hinata as it turned out was an aggressive kisser, becoming excited very easily. She parted her lips so that his tongue could gain access to her mouth. As his tongue explored her mouth, his arms descended to her legs, bringing them up so that she was straddling his hips. She gasped a little when she felt one of his hands rest on her butt.

His lips left hers and he began trailing kisses from the corner of her mouth to her jaw line. Hinata moaned softly as she felt his mouth on the side of her neck, kissing it hungrily. It tickled slightly but it sent shivers and tingles down her body. Naruto smirked against her skin as he heard her soft moans, so he bit down softly and nibbled the flesh. Hinata's eyes shot open but she didn't want him to stop at all. She continued to moan as she felt his hand creep up her stomach. But the previously soft moans became louder when she felt his hand go under her bikini top. Naruto growled a little, feeling his trunks grow tighter by the second. Hinata could feel it too and as if on impulse, grinded her hips against his.

They were so caught up in the moment that they hadn't realized how far they'd waded. They suddenly broke apart when they felt water cascade onto them. They had waded into the waterfall. But that didn't bother them at all; in fact it made them laugh.

"Well, I think that was a sign," Naruto chuckled.

Hinata nodded her head, "I—I guess we got a little carried away."

Hinata waded back into his arms and rested her head against his chest. Naruto buried his face into her hair as they continued with their "swim".

* * *

It was really late when Naruto and Hinata reached the Hyuuga compound. Probably passed midnight, but Hinata didn't care if she'd gotten in trouble. She had literally just had the best night of her life.

"We should have more nights like this," she smiled, turning to her boyfriend. Naruto laughed.

"Yeah we should! But I was thinking that we should do something different next time," Naruto grinned.

"Ahem!" they both stopped laughing when they saw that Hanabi was at the entrance, an annoyed look on her face. She was also in her pajamas, with a robe keeping her warm.

"H—Hanabi-chan!" Hinata gasped.

"You realize that it's 1:30 in the morning right?" the girl said.

Naruto and Hinata exchanged nervous looks. No, they hadn't realized that.

"Yeah, sorry, that's my fault," Naruto laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head.

"Well, I hope you two enjoyed your swim, but Hinata-nee you need to get in right now. Otousan figured that you were home hours ago," Hanabi said firmly.

Hinata nodded and turned to Naruto. Knowing that they couldn't have a full, passionate kiss in front of her sister, he bent down and gave her quick peck on the lips.

"In the house, NOW!" Hanabi hissed and Hinata walked into the compound, waving goodbye to Naruto.

Watching her disappear into the house, Naruto realized that he had not gotten her to open up more. He shook his head. He'd get her to do that slowly, but tonight, he would much like to relive the events of what had happened…

* * *

The next few days were relatively peaceful for both Naruto and Hinata in comparison with how things had been at first. Hinata seemed to be laughing a lot more and was starting to open up to Naruto, although it had nothing to do with the events of the war. Naruto didn't want to push her into telling him. But it was nice to see a smile her face so often. He didn't want to see her lose that.

But Hinata soon realized that all good things came to end. She'd thought that the depression and anxiety that she had felt previously had just gone away, and that her world would be nothing but happiness from now on.

Finally she was able to sleep without the use of sleeping pills or anything like that. One night, after a movie date with Naruto, she was able to drift into slumber relatively easy. The last few nights had been filled with nothing but thoughts and dreams about the two of them together, and she found herself giggling most of the time. But tonight as she descended into her subconscious, something very dark was expecting her in her dreams…

_**{Nightmare}**_

_Hinata opened her eyes to find that she was back on the battlefield. Her eyes widened. This was not where she was supposed to be, at all. The war was over and their side had won! No, this was just a dream! Just a dream. _

'_This is no dream, Hinata-sama," familiar voice said from behind her. Her eyes widened in shock and horror when she saw who it was._

'_N—Neji-nii!" she gasped. He was standing up perfectly straight. The curse seal on his forehead had completely vanished. The wooden spikes were still lodged in his body and blood was pouring out of his mouth profusely. _

'_N—no! This is just a dream!' she screamed. _

_Neji's face took on a look that she'd never seen before. It was evil and she'd never felt so scared to move from her life. He cackled, "Do you really think this is a dream or a nightmare? No this is your own guilt that you've been running away from. This is the fate of everyone who will ever be close to you. You think you can avoid it for so long? Soon everyone you love will end up just like me.' _

_That's when Hinata grabbed her head and screamed. _

Hinata woke up screaming and in a cold sweat. She struggled to regain her breath as she replayed the words her cousin said to her in the nightmare.

'…_Soon everyone you love will end just like me.' _

Up until now, it was just the cruel voice in her head that had been telling her that. But seeing her cousin, the person she had held near and dear to her heart, say it made the words fall on her like millions of cinder blocks. Even if she knew that Neji would have never blamed her for what happened to him, the nightmare felt too real and to her it held much truth. She curled into a ball and tears flowed out uncontrollably. Her brief period of happiness was over and her misery was here to stay…

* * *

**Please Review **

**Poll for next chapter! (Please pick only one) **

**A) Hinata decides to start training by herself, starts experimenting with more methods of self-harm and self-medication and distances herself so much that she'll hardly leave the compound. **

**B) Hinata is constantly plagued by the nightmares and voices, but acts like nothing is wrong. She does distance herself considerably from the group without really realizing it and starts acting moodier and very paranoid. **

**All right those are your options. No they are not the same by any means. One is where Hinata knows what she's doing and the second is her acting out without knowing it. That entire make out scene was pulled from…my experiences. That's how I do scenes like that. I'm sorry if you thought it sucked. Anyway, I'll be updating this story every Saturday from now on because classes are staring on Monday. Next update is January 18****th****! Loved it? Hated it? Let me know! Plz R&R! Thanks! Til next time! **

**CherryXButterfly(Angel) **


	8. Trembling and Shaking

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters. **

**A/N 1/18/14: All right it's been brought to my attention, so let me explain why I do these polls. My mind cranks out about a million ideas a day. I don't know, I can't control my imagination. So the options I give are ideas I thought would be best for the stories. That's where you guys come in. Yes, I'd like to know if my ideas are working and your input really does matter to me. Either way, I'll be happy with either option. This story is going according to plan and I'm pleased with it so far. Also, thanks for all of the reviews! 21 for just the last chapter! Thanks so much! Here's last chapter's poll results! **

**Option A: 7**

**Option B: 13**

**B won by 6 votes! Okay great, now I let's take a look at Hinata's mental state after that nightmare. **

**Warning: There's a panic attack **

**Chapter 8: Trembling and Shaking**

* * *

Hinata's face was buried into her pillow. She didn't know what time it was and neither did she care. All she knew was after that little nightmare, there was no way that she could sleep. Even though she kept telling herself that it was just a dream, she couldn't convince herself. It all felt way too real now.

Before it was just the voices in her head that had been telling her things, but seeing Neji coming into her dreams and telling her that she's both running away from her guilt as well as telling her that everyone was eventually going to end up like him.

She still didn't want to believe it. She couldn't. It was just a dream anyway. But still, the feelings were not going away.

'_**Believe me now?' **_

'_No.'_

'_**Even your cousin was telling you that…'**_

'_That wasn't Neji-nii, it was just a dream…'_

'_**You'll regret it…'**_

'_Go away…' _

She assumed that it was morning now, as sunlight was streaming in through her window. She reluctantly got out of the bed and stretched. Her muscles ached from her nearly sleepless night.

She couldn't go on acting like the guilt she was feeling wasn't there. But she didn't need to show the whole world that either. She'd been terrible about keeping her feelings in check. She'd need to act like the dreams weren't happening, and that she was finally moving passed the events of the war. Yeah, that was a good idea.

Being so lost in thought, she'd forgotten to lock the bathroom door. So when Hanabi walked into the bathroom to tell her that breakfast was about to be served, Hinata jumped about 7 feet in the air.

Hanabi almost burst out laughing, "Geez! Calm down Hinata-nee, it's just me."

Hinata grabbed her chest and glared at her sister, "Next time, knock!"

Hanabi was a little taken aback by her sister's irritability. That was extremely rare. She wasn't even like that when it was that time of the month. "I—I umm I'm sorry."

Hinata groaned, "I'll be there in five minutes."

"Umm, all right…" Hanabi mumbled before exiting quickly. Hinata immediately regretted her behavior when she saw her sister scurry out of the room. She'd be sure to give her an apology later.

Hinata sighed and quickly washed her face and changed out of her pajamas. She sighed and looked in the mirror. She looked tired, but color was starting to come back to her face again. She would have smiled had it not been for the fact that her own mind had turned against her. No, she'd have to find a way to suppress it. She had finally started getting happiness back into her life, and there was no way she was going to allow her anxiety or depression get in the way of that…

* * *

"Do you think she should see someone then?" Hiashi asked, picking up some of his breakfast with chopsticks.

Hanabi shrugged, "I don't know. She seemed fine the past few days. Happy I'd even say."

Hiashi nodded his head, "Perhaps she's…"

Hanabi knew where he was going with that and she immediately shook her head, "Even if she is, she's not the type to snap at people. Even at her worst."

Hiashi thought for a second before slowly nodding his head, "I'll have to keep a closer eye on her then."

They looked up when they heard the door slide open. It revealed the form of a smiling, somewhat cheerful Hinata. Even for Hinata on her good days, this was really strange.

"Good morning," she smiled before taking her place at the table.

"Good morning Hinata," her father answered with a nod.

She smiled as she picked up her chopsticks. She was completely oblivious to the fact that her father and sister were eyeing her. Hanabi was the most confused. Was this the same girl who had snapped at her for coming up behind her this morning?

"Hanabi-chan, I'm sorry for snapping at you this morning. It was uncalled for," Hinata apologized and Hanabi just nodded her head. She didn't want to seem too shocked about it.

"So what are your plans today?" Hiashi inquired, turning his full attention to her.

"Just training with Naruto-kun and the others," she answered, chewing on the last bite of her food.

"I see," Hiashi said. "Any signs of improvement?"

"Every day otousan," Hinata smiled.

Hiashi picked up his tea when he realized something. Hinata had gone this entire conversation without stammering or stuttering a bit. Normally he would be happy about it, if he didn't see the other emotions behind the smiling face.

"Well I best be going now," she smiled politely as she bowed her head. She got up and walked out of the room.

Hanabi looked after her sister and when she closed the door, she turned back to her father. "Well she seems to be fine now."

Hiashi shook his head, "No you're wrong, there's something else. A lot more than meets the eye…"

* * *

Hinata walked slowly towards the training grounds. She really was in no rush to get there. She didn't really want to talk to anyone besides Naruto anyway…They were technically not supposed to meet for another hour any way. In the meantime, she'd walk around trying to clear her mind of any possible doubts.

'_**Girl, you're a mess…' **_

'_Thanks I didn't notice at all…' _

'_**Maybe I was a little too hard on you while you slept?' **_

'_So that was you! How could you…?' _

'_**Because I want you to come to your senses. I know how guilty you are really feeling. But I also know that no one is worth dying for. Least of all for you.' **_

'_How could you use Neji-nii against me?' _

'_**You left me with no choice. But that's all I really did. The battlefield and Neji just standing there was all you. I barely have to do anything anymore. You really have no idea how messed up you really are…' **_

'_But you just said that you…' _

'_**Neji was just my mouthpiece. Although, that was probably what he was thinking…' **_

'_No don't lie to me!' _

'_**Honestly, the only way you're going to let go of your guilt is by...' **_

'_No, I don't want to hear it! Just go away!' _

Hinata grabbed her head and almost screamed. She would have had it not been for the fact that there were many people on the streets.

"Hey Hinata!" Hinata turned around to see Naruto walking towards her, his signature grin on his face. She smiled at the sight of him.

"Naruto-kun," she said, walking towards him. She got on her toes and kissed him. He had to have grown at least 4 inches since the war had ended.

Hinata had become a lot more comfortable around Naruto now. She had almost no reservations about kissing him in public.

"You look great today!" he said.

Hinata smiled, until she realized that that wasn't something that Naruto didn't say very often, so the next words that left her mouth were, "I don't look great on other days?"

Naruto immediately regretted saying that, "No, I just meant you look great today, and I should probably say it more often."

Hinata wasn't confused, "Then why don't you?"

Naruto looked down at his girlfriend and frowned. This wasn't like her to be like this, "If you want, then I will."

Hinata blushed just a little bit. She was feeling more anxious than usual. "I—I'm sorry."

Naruto smiled and shook his head, "Don't worry about it! Want to take a walk with me?"

Hinata smiled and nodded, "You know I do!"

Without much delay, the two started walking into an area completely surrounded by trees. Besides their private, special spot, they liked to take walks in enclosed areas like this. It was nice for privacy.

"So, I was thinking Naruto-kun…" Hinata started, a faint blush appearing on her cheek.

Naruto looked at her curiously because usually it was him who had to initiate conversation. He leaned in closer so that he could hear her soft voice better. "You were thinking?"

"Well, we've been dating for a couple of weeks now, and I was just feeling that it's not appropriate if we go any further without you meeting my father," she answered. She looked at him, fearful that he would panic.

Maybe he was panicking. She was a part of the Hyuuga clan after all. If anyone even thought to date outside of the clan, many times it didn't end well. Why would Naruto want to put himself through that for someone like her? Without so much as a warning, tears began to stream from her eyes for no apparent reason.

Naruto noticed this right away. He raised his hands to her cheeks and gently wiped the tears away with his thumbs. He looked at her and noticed that she was trembling and shaking, like she was scared stiff or something. Hinata was having a hard time breathing, and she couldn't figure out why. She didn't get what was happening with her, because one minute she was fine and now she couldn't get control of her body.

She was feeling afraid for some reason. Her chest felt constricted, like she was wearing some sort of corset that was two sizes smaller and pulled tightly around her. Her heart was beating so fast that she was sure it was going to burst at any moment. She'd never felt so out of control.

Naruto was panicked. He'd seen Hinata terrified before, but not to the degree that she was right now. He wrapped his arms around her and held her. "Hinata! Hey Hinata! Hey, what's the matter?"

"I—I don't know!" she stammered as she was struggling to get a hold of her breathing. She looked up at Naruto, hoping that his face would bring some comfort and motivation to regain control of her breathing. But what she saw terrified her even more.

_'…this is your own guilt that you've been running away from. This is the fate of everyone who will ever be close to you. You think you can avoid it for so long? Soon everyone you love will end up just like me.'_

She didn't know how, but the moment her cousin's face came into her view, a terrified shriek ripped from Hinata's lips, causing Naruto to jump back a little bit.

She grabbed her head and sunk to the ground. Naruto didn't hesitate to drop to his knees and put his arms around her. He could hear that her breathing was becoming steadier as he rocked her back and forth. He brought his lips to her dark blue tresses and kissed them gently.

"Hey, hey shh, I'm here. Nothing's going to happen to you," he reassured her, rubbing her back as he did so.

Naruto's words did do the trick as after a few more minutes of shaking and trying to regain her breath, she finally calmed down. "T—Thank you."

Naruto smiled and held her close, "As for your question, I'm down to meet your father any time. Just let me know when."

A tiny beautiful smile graced Hinata's lips, "You're the best. Thank you so much."

"Anything for you," he whispered against her hair.

"One more thing?" she requested.

"Yes?"

"Kiss me?"

Naruto didn't need anything more than that before his lips came crashing down on hers. Hinata kissed back almost immediately, but she couldn't find herself to enjoy this kiss very much. The words that her head was saying to her started to make more and more sense.

_'**Hinata, let's forget for a second that you're the Hyuuga heiress or the fact that everyone close to you is going to eventually share the same fate as Neji. You have a lot of problems, and do you honestly think it's fair for Naruto to have a girlfriend who can't even control herself? You have a responsibility to do what's right for him. If you really love him then you know what you have to do. If you love Kiba, Shino, or Tenten either, then you have to do what's best for them. You've already started honey. You know what I'm saying is true. So quit kissing him and face the truth. You know what to do…' **_

Hinata continued kissing him, not being able to comply with the voice's demands. She forgot the fact that she put everyone she loved and care about into danger. But instead this had become more personal. She had more issues than anyone deserved to deal with. She couldn't do that to her friends or even her boyfriend. Her heart cracked as she realized that not only was the voice on point, it was also beginning to sound less like an outsider and more like her…

* * *

**Please Review**

**Poll (or my best ideas for the next chapter) **

**A) Naruto is invited to the compound by Hiashi where he reveals to Naruto how worried about Hinata he is and requests that he keep a closer eye on her and to keep her happy as much as he can. Hinata overhears only part of it and thinks that Naruto is only going out with her on her father's behest. **

**B) Naruto and Hinata are training with the others when someone gets injured pretty badly. Hinata has horrible flashbacks and the voice in her head convinces her that it was because she was there that it happened. **

**C) All of the above **

**Yes from now on, I'm adding the all of the above option in case you love both of my ideas. I know neither sounds all that pleasant. Again, these polls are the ideas on what I want to write about and you just help me pick since I'm so indecisive. So yeah, I put aside sleep to write this because my cousin got me hooked on Gossip Girl and I've been watching that instead of typing this chapter like a good girl. Hehe sorry, I'll make sure that it doesn't happen again. About that panic attack, it was very similar to one that I experienced before, so I wrote it completely out of experience. Also thank you everyone who reviewed! Keep em coming! The next update will be January 25th! Remember, I update every Saturday! Loved it? Hated it? Let me know! Plz R&R! Thanks! Til next time! **

**CherryXButterfly(Angel) **


	9. Fading

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters. **

**IMPORTANT A/N 1/26/14: No more polls. I also don't know how many of you actually read the Author's Note, but here's a confession. This story was always intended to be a personal piece for me. I started polling for this story because I started caring too much about what the people wanted, instead of more of what I wanted. So here is how the rest of the story is going to go: it's all going to be based on something parallel to my dealing with PTSD. I chose Hinata because she seemed like the best choice.**

**So when you read this, keep it in mind that it's sort of based on how I dealt with it, even though Hinata is going through things differently and it's going along with the post-war world. Voices, drinking, self-harm, etc. were all things that I had to deal with. So through this fic, you are getting to know me a little bit. Everything I've polled so far were the thing I picked and pulled from my experiences and that's why I considered them my best experiences and ideas to share. So there will be no more. I will write this as honestly as I possibly can. If you follow any of my other stories then those will continue to poll. But no more for this story. Here are the final poll results. **

**Option A: 3**

**Option B: 3**

**Option C: 9**

**Option C won! Well thanks for all of the voting you guys! Now let's see what I can do! (; **

**Warning: None **

**Chapter 9: Fading**

* * *

Hinata's little incident would've been enough for Naruto to carry her to the hospital, but she quickly shrugged that off. She said it was something that happened on and off. He didn't believe her, but Hinata was more obstinate than she let on. So he suggested that he just take her home, which she shook her head at. She wanted to train and forget that this ever happened.

"Hinata I really don't think—," Naruto tried once again, but Hinata only huffed.

"I said I wanted to train, please don't stop me."

"But I'm worried…" Naruto mumbled.

"Well I can take care of myself, I don't need you to worry," she snapped.

Naruto raised an eyebrow, "I didn't say that you couldn't, but I will worry about it."

Hinata shot Naruto a look, which caught Naruto completely off guard. Hinata never gave those kind of looks to anyone for any reason at all. Maybe Sakura or Ino, but not Hinata. He furrowed his eyebrows.

"Look, I don't know what's wrong with you, but I am worried about you. And I really don't think that you're up to training today," he stated firmly.

"I'm training today Naruto-kun. Whether or not you like it, I'll still do it," Hinata answered, turning around and starting to walk away. The frown on Naruto's face deepened. He'd never fought with Hinata before on anything. Was this how normal couples were?

"Hinata, get back here!" Naruto shouted. She paused for a second before continuing onward. She didn't know what had gotten into her because him asking her to stay back would've been enough usually. But her feet kept moving forward. That was until she felt a tight grip on her wrist and she turned around to face an annoyed Naruto.

"What are you doing, Naruto-kun?"

"We're going to talk Hinata. I'm tired of this. I need to know what's wrong with you so I can help you, but I can't unless you talk to me," he answered, almost pleading. It was enough to break her heart, but not enough to change her mind.

"There's nothing to talk about," she answered dully.

Naruto was about to open his mouth to call her out but he was interrupted by Kiba, Shino, and Tenten. They were here for their morning training. But they had instead walked into what seemed to be a lover's quarrel.

"Stupid question, but is everything all right?" Kiba asked. Hinata nodded her head.

"We just had a small argument, that's all," she answered. Naruto's face was sour but he decided to keep quiet for the time being. Even though it didn't make him any less upset than it already did.

"So are we training?" Tenten questioned and everyone but Naruto nodded his head. "Um, are you not training with us today?"

"Of course I am, sorry just have a lot on my mind," he answered, staring at his girlfriend from the corner of his eye. The tension between the two was getting extremely uncomfortable for everyone around.

"Well, if you two need a minute…" Kiba suggested only to have Hinata shake her head.

"No, no. Let's get to training!"

Everyone was a little alarmed at the fact that Hinata was not stuttering or stammering even a little bit. But they decided not to waste any more time, because it was almost noon anyway.

* * *

Naruto and Hinata did their best not to come into contact with each other during their training. After their little spat, neither of them were particularly interested in talking to each other. But they did exchange a look from time to time.

Naruto wondered what had happened in between them kissing and their spat. It all went to hell faster than he could grasp the situation. Maybe he shouldn't have been so forceful with her. But she still didn't have the right to hurt him by walking away and shrugging off his worry.

Hinata, meanwhile, was trying to focus more on her training than thinking about her boyfriend. Even then, he managed to creep into her mind every now and again. She'd almost taken a hit from a few kunai when he did manage to invade her thoughts.

And sadly, her multitasking mind was about to come with a price. They had all decided to do a bit of training as a group. Well, it was going well for a time. Hinata was able to focus pretty well and keep her mind where it should be.

"All right, let's go back and do this one more time," Tenten suggested and Hinata nodded her head.

Hinata got into position, but then Tenten shook her head. "I think you should throw the weapons this time."

Hinata arched an eyebrow, "But that's your specialty."

Tenten smiled, "That's true, but I think we could better our abilities in other areas as well. And maybe your abilities with weapons could use a little improvement."

She didn't mean it in a mean or mocking way, but with Hinata's current state, she couldn't help but take it the wrong way. But before she could really say anything, everyone had dispersed, getting into position. Hinata sighed and jumped onto a tree branch. Tenten had all of her scrolls and weapons placed up there. Her usually gentle face was marred by the scowl.

'_**Naruto probably told them something.' **_

'_No, he wouldn't do that…' _

'_**Well after this morning's slip up, don't be surprised. And that other girl Tenten was totally mocking you.' **_

'_N—no she wasn't…' _

'_**Pfft, do you honestly think that she would randomly start hanging out with you because she's worried about you? Please the girl barely talked to you before now. Now she's acting like you're best friend.' **_

'_What are you trying to say?' _

'_**Everyone knows how crazy you are. They're trying to get on your good side so you don't end up hurting them too.' **_

'_That makes no sense.' _

'_**It makes all the sense, oh unless you want me to remind you of that sweet little dream you had.' **_

'_What does that have to do with Tenten?' _

'_**Neji was her best friend, her teammate, and also the person she spent the most time with. And who did he throw himself in front of? Oh that's right, it was you. She probably blames you for it.' **_

'_Tenten's not like that at all. She's not Sasuke…' _

'_**You'd be surprised to see what people would do in their grief.'**_

'_B—be quiet!'_

'_**No…' **_

Hinata's mental battle raged on, but the voice was managing to win. Convincing her that she was responsible for the grief that everyone was currently experiencing, and it was somehow managing to turn her against Tenten. Hinata liked to think the best of people, and Tenten had never done anything mean to her. Yet her guilt and anger were starting to build up, and they were all being directed at her. Rage began to cloud her vision. She activated her Byakugan and got as many kunai as she could. The glare was intense and it was making everyone a little bit uncomfortable.

Well that was until she started chucking them at an insane rate. No one really had an objection, until they realized that they were being thrown at one person. And that person was Tenten. Of course, she was the first person to notice.

"Hey, Hinata! I can only dodge so many at a time," she yelled. Hinata didn't really say anything but she kept throwing them.

"Hey Hinata! Cut it out! You're going to—ahhh!" Kiba bellowed as 3 kunai hit his abdominal area. While he had been trying to get her attention, he ended up jumping into the crossfire. Now normally getting hit with kunai wouldn't have been a big deal, but Hinata had thrown them so fast and with such force that the kunai very nearly went right through him. They were instead only slightly coming out of his back.

"Kiba!" Tenten gasped as he fell to the ground and groaned and yelled.

'_**Hey! Why the hell did you do that?' **_

Hinata blinked a little bit before deactivating her Byakugan. She was drawing a blank. What had just happened in the last few minutes?

'_**Were you trying to kill them? Look at Kiba! Damn, you really are trying to make sure that everyone in your life ends up just like Neji.' **_

'_W—what are you—' _

Hinata gasped when she looked down and saw Kiba losing blood at an alarming rate. Did she do that? The injuries looked like someone had taken a sword and ran him right through. She was having a hard time believing that a few kunai could do that.

She jumped and started running towards Kiba who was groaning from the pain and starting to lose consciousness.

Tenten checked out the wounds. "The kunai are buried into his lower back. If we don't get him some treatment right now, this could get even more serious."

Hinata flushed, she'd never meant to hurt Kiba. She'd never meant to hurt anyone.

Naruto turned his head to see Hinata, looking like she was ready to burst into tears. Unfortunately, he was too upset to really think tactfully.

"Hinata, you need to go, right now," he said in a low voice. It was a tone that she hadn't heard from him before and she was a little taken aback by it.

"But—," she started but Naruto shook his head.

"I knew I should've taken you to the hospital or something after this morning. Now look what happened because I didn't. Just go home, would you?"

Hinata's heart sunk as the words left his mouth. She backed up as they all lifted Kiba up and started carrying him away. Once they were gone, Hinata's tears fell freely. What had she done?

'_You were right…I am crazy…' _

'_**So do you know what you have to do?' **_

'_Y—yes…'_

* * *

Kiba was going to be all right, even if he'd be down for a little while. The kunai had missed his vital organs by very little, but missed them nonetheless. Everyone sighed in relief as they waited outside of the hospital room. Sakura was doing the treatment and she had rarely failed them in the past when it came to healing.

Tenten looked over at Naruto, who had a cross expression on his face. He had worn that expression pretty much the entire day. And to top it all off, this whole thing with Hinata seemed to be getting to him.

"Hey Naruto?" Tenten whispered.

Naruto turned his head slightly in her direction, "Yeah?"

"I think you should talk to her," Tenten suggested.

"There's nothing to say to her. It's not use really, she doesn't talk to me. It's feels like I'm the only one who seems to care," Naruto sighed.

Tenten shook her head, "She's just a little reserved. This whole relationship thing is new to her too. But you aren't going to get it out of her by forcing it out."

"Then how? I've been trying so hard to see what's wrong. And then this happens," he asked.

Tenten smiled, "Look, you need to be a little gentle with her. She's not going through the best of times right now. Just talk to her."

Naruto looked down at the ground, drew in a big sigh, and stared at the ground. Maybe she was right, but what as he supposed to say? Well, he'd think about it on the 10 minute walk from the hospital to her place…

* * *

Hiashi was sitting and having his tea. He was very out of the loop when it came to his daughters. It didn't really help that he was a single father raising two girls with absolutely no understanding of how their minds worked.

He was closer to Hanabi than he was to Hinata. She rarely talked to him about anything. But he wasn't stupid or that detached. He knew something was wrong with his oldest daughter. She could smile as wide as she wanted to in front of the whole world, but she couldn't hide it. Her eyes were always the huge give away.

But who could he go to? She refused to open up to Hanabi. His teammates rarely came around the compound, so that only left Naruto.

Was it right to question his daughter's boyfriend behind her back? Well, he would have done that anyway, he was a father after all. Maybe he could invite him over, yes that would be a good idea.

Just as he was finished with that train of thought, a knock came at his door. He looked up and saw that one of his servants were there.

"Yes?"

"Naruto's here, he was wondering if you know where Hinata-sama is," the servant answer.

"Tell him to come in here, I would like a word with him," Hiashi requested and the servant nodded his head and stepped aside. Naruto looked confused but saw that Hiashi was signaling him to come in.

He walked in slowly and cautiously. He knew he'd have to come face to face with Hyuuga Hiashi eventually, just not like this, or without his girlfriend.

Hiashi took a sip of his tea and motioned towards the seat across from him. Naruto sat down and looked in everywhere but his eyes. This was going to be a very uncomfortable meeting.

* * *

Hinata had dragged her body home. After what happened today, all she wanted to do was steal into her family's sake stash, lock herself in her room, and drink off the memory. She had promised not to do it again, but she was more than willing to slip up this time. She was finding it harder and harder to care about what would happen to her. She was probably already a hopeless nutcase in everyone's eyes.

She sluggishly made her way through the compound until she got to the dining room. She was about to open the door and greet her father, but she heard conversation coming from inside. Her father was talking to someone, but she didn't know who.

"I know that this is a bit awkward for the both of us," her father was saying.

That's when she heard Naruto's nervous chuckle, she froze. This was not a good sign.

"Not at all, sir. I just wanted to talk to and see Hinata, if that's all right."

"She's not here at the moment. In fact, I don't know where she is right now. I assumed she was out training with you and her team," Hiashi said.

"Oh, I told her to come home, she was uh, kind of out of it," Naruto replied. "That was hours ago though."

Hiashi's voice then took on a more serious and concerned tone, "I hope for your sake that she's taking a walk."

Naruto nodded his head, "I had to take Kiba to the hospital, if I could have I would have definitely brought her home."

'_He's lying…'_

"The Inuzuka boy is in the hospital? What happened?"

Naruto sighed, "It was a training accident. Hinata was a little out of it after it happened so I told her to go home."

Hiashi sighed, "It seems that my daughter has been more than just a little bit out of it."

Naruto nodded his head, "Yeah, I don't know, I just feel like I can't get through to her anymore. I wonder if I'm the right person for this job."

'_Job?! What job?!' _

Hiashi put down his tea and looked at the blonde boy in front of him, "You make her happy. I've known for a long time how she's felt about you."

"But she won't talk to me. She's always dodging the subject," Naruto went on.

"Naruto I have a request, just a small request," Naruto sat up and leaned in a bit.

"What would that be?"

"I want you to keep making her happy, by any means possible. And please keep a close eye on her. After my nephew—," Hiashi had to stop for a second. The subject of Neji was still too hard for him to talk about.

Hinata backed away from the doorway. Was that what was going on? Was this the case from the beginning? Is that why Naruto suddenly took an interest in her and asked her to be his girlfriend? Did her father really set her up?

'_**Told ya this would happen. So are you actually going to go through with this?' **_

'_I—I can't do this anymore…I can't force him to stay if I wasn't what he wanted.' _

'_**Wow, I never thought your father would actually do something that sneaky.' **_

'_I can't…I don't even know what to think anymore…' _

With that Hinata ran towards her room, trying to hide her muffled sobs.

"No, sir you really don't have to say it, I get it," Naruto whispered, feeling a twinge of guilt in his gut.

Hiashi nodded his head slowly before looking up at the boy. Now was a better time than ever to ask him the question, "How do you feel about my daughter."

Naruto stopped cold. Did he really just ask him that? "S—sir?"

Hiashi smiled, "It's all right, and you can be honest with me."

Naruto thought for a second. How did he feel about Hinata? He liked her a lot. He'd never really liked anyone this much before, not even Sakura. How was he supposed to answer this question.

"Sir to be honest, whenever I'm around her it's like," Naruto thought for a second. "It's like there's no one else really around. I find myself smiling like an idiot, my palms get sweaty, and whenever I see her it's like I'm being pulled towards her. When she's sad, I feel it too. And it's also like I'd do anything for her, like she has for me."

Hiashi smile grew wider, "Do you still not know how you are feeling exactly?"

Naruto shook his head. Hiashi smiled even more and shook his head. He really was a thick one.

"That's the exact same way I felt about Hinata's mother when I fell in love with her," hopefully that was enough to tip him off.

Naruto froze. Love? He had no experience with love. He didn't know what it was like, or what it was supposed to be like. Maybe this was it. Maybe that explained why he was so upset with her earlier. It wasn't because she was hiding something from him that was hurting him. It was because she was hurt that was hurting him. Because he loved her.

Naruto stood up and Hiashi did too. The next thing Hiashi would say would be shocking, "Go tell her, you have my blessing. She just got home I sense her chakra."

Naruto was out of the room before he knew it. He knew where Hinata's room was, he had been there a million times, not that anyone else there needed to know about that. But he was practically running he was so excited.

He didn't even bother knocking on Hinata's door; he just opened the door to find the girl sitting there already. She was looking out the window with a rather dull and gloomy expression on her face. She looked dead. Naruto frowned for a second, but decided to tell her to get her to smile once again.

"Hey Hinata?" Naruto smiled gently. Hinata turned to him, she didn't smile.

"Naruto-kun, I know why you're here," she whispered.

He smiled even wider. That means she knew how he felt about her. Great, that would make this moment even better.

"Hinata I—," he started but Hinata shook her head.

"I heard you and my father talking. I know why you really went out with me in the first place," she went on. Naruto's eyes widened. Where was she going with this? "Naruto-kun, I can't be selfish. I can't keep you here knowing that it's not what you want. I want to see you happy. Even if that means…letting you go."

Naruto's eyes widened. He prayed that this wasn't going where he thought this was going. He couldn't have this happened. Not when he finally realized what she was to him. "No Hinata, it's not what you are thinking…"

"No need to lie Naruto-kun. I understand. That's why I have to do this," she whispered, her voice breaking.

Naruto could feel his chest starting to hurt and his voice broke as he said, "What are you getting at?"

"Naruto-kun, I don't think that we should see each other anymore…"

* * *

**Please Review**

**WAIT BEFORE YOU PRESS THE UNFAVORITE/UNFOLLOW BUTTON THING, THIS IS NOT THE END OF OUR FAVORITE COUPLE I SWEAR! But there's something I love about people having to go through a lot to be together and I honestly admire it. Don't worry; it's only going to get a lot more intense after this. Now there will be a little self-harming to come, fair warning. It's a hard topic for me to write about and I know some of you have dealt with it. I'll try to be as delicate as possible with it I promise. Okay I am so sorry that I didn't update this yesterday. My health completely tanked this week and I'm late with all of my updates. But I promise that the next chapter will be out on February 1****st****! Remember update is every Saturday! **

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**Did you like this chapter? Yes or no? **

**Loved it? Hated it? Let me know! Plz R&R! Thanks! Til next time! **

**CherryXButterfly(Angel) **


	10. Broken

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of its characters. **

**A/N 2/1/14: February already? This year is already flying right by. Well I loved the reviews from last time, they were nice to see. I'm sorry if I have to break up Naruto and Hinata for now, but if we know Naruto, he's not going to give up on her, whether or not they are together. Well here's a warning: There will be self-harm and maybe a lemon later on in the story. You have been warned. **

**Warning: A heated make out session and sad drinking **

**Chapter 10: Broken**

* * *

"Naruto-kun I don't think we should see each other anymore…" Hinata choked out. She felt herself dying slowly on the inside.

Naruto's heart felt like it had exploded, and not in the way that he wanted. He prayed that he had just imagined what she had just said, "Hinata, please tell me you're kidding…"

Hinata bit back her tears as she looked him right in the eye, "I'm not. Naruto-kun, I want you to be happy, and if that means without me, I'm willing to let you go."

"No Hinata please, you've got it all wrong…" Naruto pleaded, stepping forward, only to her step backwards.

"We shouldn't see each other anymore. I'm sorry, but you should leave," she whispered. As quiet as her voice was, Naruto could hear the heart break in her voice. She didn't want to do this at all. But for some reason, she felt like she had to.

"I'm not leaving Hinata. I know you don't want me to leave. You don't want to end things with me. And I can't let you," he stepped closer and grabbed her wrists tightly.

"Naruto-kun, you need to leave. It's over I'm sorry," the heartbreak was saturated in her voice. She wanted him to stay so bad, but she couldn't.

"Hinata, if you're worried about my happiness, all I want is…" he started but Hinata shook her head.

"Please go," she whispered. Him being there was making it even harder for her.

"No, I won't," the hold on her wrists got tighter.

She struggled to loosen her wrists from his grip, but Naruto refused to let go. "Naruto-kun, I'll scream. You need to leave right now."

"Why are you so eager to get rid of me?" his face inched closer to hers. "Just say you don't want me anymore, and I'm gone."

Hinata bit her lip. It was already obvious to her that she'd interpreted the whole thing wrong, but she was not about to change her mind. Even if Naruto did want her, she couldn't see him get hurt. She couldn't control herself anymore and one too many people had already become collateral damage. "I—I—I…"

"See, you can't say it. Because you don't want me gone. You still want me. It's written all over your face. So why are you trying to end things?" he whispered.

Hinata closed her eyes tightly and tried to control her breathing. She couldn't tell him, he'd only try to talk her out of it. She couldn't let that happen, she just couldn't. "Because I have to…"

Naruto shook his head, "No, you don't. You don't have to let me go. No one is stopping us; even your own father gave us his blessing. Please, Hinata! You don't have to do this!"

Hinata finally managed to loosen herself from his grip and stepped back, only be backed into the wall. "I have to do this. Naruto-kun, I—I can't see you get hurt."

Naruto looked confused at the statement, "What do you mean get hurt? Hinata I'm fine."

Hinata shook her head once again. "Yes you're fine right now. But look what happened to Kiba. I'm not in control of myself Naruto-kun. You could be next. Please, we can't be together."

"Is that what's been bothering you? You're afraid I'm going to get hurt because of you?" Naruto whispered, stepping closer until he was practically rubbing against her.

Hinata kept her eyes squeezed shut. If she looked at him, she'd lose all sign of rational thought. "Naruto, please leave."

"Then say that you don't want me anymore. Say it and I'm gone," he challenged. He knew she wouldn't be able to. He already knew how she felt about him. She'd told him a long time ago. He had not forgotten.

"I—I," she choked up.

"Before you say anything else, I do want you to know something," he leaned in so that his lips were practically touching her ear. She opened her eyes slightly.

"Look, I know things have been really weird between us today, but it had to take seeing you lose your mind to realize something. I never want to see you like that. Your smile suits you the most. And I want to be the one to make you smile. I know that sounds cheesy, but it's true," he whispered.

Hinata gasped softly, "N—Naruto-kun…"

"I came here to talk to you, but I bumped into your dad. And he helped me realize a lot. Including what I'm about to say to you," he paused for a second. "Hinata, I—I—Hinata I love you."

The words didn't come out quite as smoothly as he would've liked them to. But it did make him smile when Hinata's eyes went completely wide.

In another time and place, those three words and syllables would have had her heart inflate. But not like this, not when she was feeling like she had to keep him away. "I love you" were the three words that she had always wanted to hear from him. She always pictured that it would make her happy. But right now, it was the saddest thing for her.

"Y—You do?" she whispered. Naruto frowned, because the amount of heartbreak in her voice had only increased.

He pulled away slightly so that he would be looking only at her face. There was a lot of love and sadness in her eyes. As for her, she couldn't help it anymore. If she was going to end things with the one person she loved the most and who loved her too, she might as well end it in a special way. She had gotten what she wanted: Naruto's love. But it wasn't enough to chase her fears or nightmares away. He deserved better than to be saddled with a person like that.

Naruto couldn't take it anymore. She was standing way too close, and he loved her. He closed the space between them. Hinata, at first was completely caught off guard, but the voice in her head seemed to be distant as she gave into their kiss.

This kiss wasn't sweet or romantic in the slightest. It was passionate and urgent. Every emotion they had ever felt and had poured into the kiss. Their tongues began wrestling and Hinata could feel his hands going lower and lower. He stopped at her legs, about to lift them up. But Hinata was quicker. She had managed to inch herself up against the wall enough to jump and straddle him. Naruto was a little surprised, but all the more turned on by her actions.

Naruto's mouth left hers and hungrily began to kiss her jaw and neck. Hinata moaned louder than usual and started grinding her hips against his. He growled against her throat as he began to bite it a little. Hinata gasped, but continued with her actions, earning her even more bites.

If one was to walk in on them right now, they would think that they were having sex right there against her wall. It certainly felt that way because Hinata could feel him through their clothing. The one thing separating them from doing so was their pants.

'_**What the hell do you think you're doing?!' **_

'_I—I hmmmm…'_

'_**Oh quit your moaning! Have you forgotten what you were supposed to do? One minute you say you're really going to end things, next thing he's dry humping you against the wall?' **_

'_I ummm…' _

'_**Focus baka! You aren't doing yourself any favors here! I mean look at you two right now? Is this how you want to initiate a break up?' **_

Hinata's eyes opened wide as she looked at the situation. Naruto was ravishing her neck as both his hands her grabbing her butt. His crotch was rubbing against hers and she felt just how hard he was.

"N—Naruto-kun! We have to stop! Please stop!" she pleaded, attempting to push him away.

He continued to kiss her neck, but Hinata grabbed his face and pushed it back. He looked confused. "Hinata what are you…"

"You need to leave, this was a mistake," she panted. She felt her heart crack as she said it. She couldn't bring herself to look at Naruto.

"Hinata, what are you…" he attempted to reach out, but Hinata shook her head furiously.

"I don't want you anymore. You need to leave," she choked out. There she said it, the words that would hurt her most to say. She was pretty sure that the minute that they left her mouth, there'd be no going back. There would be no salvaging their relationship.

Naruto stood there dumfounded. His ears had to be deceiving him. There was no way that the girl, who had loved him unconditionally for years, was telling him that. It was worse than all of the villagers shunning and scorning him for all those years.

"You can't really mean that…"

"I do," Hinata said in a cold voice. "Please get out, or I'll call someone to do it."

He couldn't feel anger after that. The pain and the hurt were too great. But he was a man of his word. If she truly didn't want him anymore, then he would do what she wanted him to do.

"If that's what you really want," he mumbled heartbrokenly. The heart break in his voice wanted to make Hinata cry and take back everything she had just said. She would always want him, but her fate wouldn't allow her to be with him.

She didn't say anything and turned her back to him so that he wouldn't see the tears cascading down her face. She needed for him to believe that her words were true.

"Goodbye," he whispered. The minute Hinata heard the door slide shut, she collapsed onto her knees.

'_**You did the right thing…' **_

'_Then why does it feel like I'm going to die?' _

'_**He was your first love. But you did the right thing. Being with you would've been too risky. I reiterate, you've done the right thing.'**_

'_Then why does it feel so wrong?' _

The voice didn't answer back so she dragged her body off of the ground and onto the bed. She sobbed harder than ever before. She'd finally done it. She told Naruto to go away and out of her life. And with that, she removed any care she gave about herself. She didn't care if she died right then and there. She hoped she would for that matter. Not because he was no longer hers, but because she had hurt him. And she would rather die than face what she had just done. Maybe the voice was right, all she was doing was running away from the guilt, but she just didn't seem to care. The sobs didn't seize at all and they continued until her head hurt and the tears could flow no more. She fell asleep soon after, knowing that her nightmares would hit her with a vengeance…

* * *

Naruto wobbled as he walked towards his apartment. Damn it, the sake didn't do shit for him. Yes, he had found the door to the Hyuuga's supply of alcohol. After how badly Hinata had broken his heart, he stopped caring all together. It was very out of character for him to not only break into someone else's supply of alcohol, but also to wander the streets inebriated at night. He thought that he could try to drink away his devastation, but it didn't do anything. The pain remained and only seemed to intensify as the seconds flew by.

How could she say that? How could she just say that she didn't want him anymore? After so many years of pining after him and giving him all of her love, how could she suddenly decide to stop caring about him?

He didn't want to believe it and he didn't. The only reason he even walked out of there was because Hinata seemed so hell bent on ending their relationship. But why? He almost hoped that the liquid in the bottle would help him come up with answers.

He continued to wobble along the empty streets, not paying attention to the small amount of people who were for some reason, walking the streets at this hour.

"Dobe, is that you?" a familiar voice asked. It sounded like Sasuke, yeah maybe it was Sasuke. He hadn't really seen or heard from Sasuke since they got back. He'd had hell to pay with his punishments.

"Oh heyyy thereeee teme!" Naruto slurred as he wobbled towards the blob that was actually Sasuke. Sasuke paused for a second. Was that sake in his hand? How'd he manage to get a hold of that? Everyone knew who he was so there was no way in hell that he could have gotten away with lying about his age.

"You're drunk…" he stated. He wasn't saying it to state the obvious, but there was a hint of genuine concern in his voice.

"Youuu bet!" Naruto yelled and Sasuke sighed.

"Dobe, it's 1:30 in the morning. Why the hell are you wandering the streets this late? And since when do you drink?"

"Why are YOUUU?" Naruto asked, pointing a drunken, accusing finger at his friend. "Out so late huh? Don't be a hypocrite temeeee!"

Sasuke shook his head, "I had errands to run. The Hokage runs us like dogs all day. I'm going home now, well I was going to anyway…"

"So what's stopping youuuuuu?" Naruto slurred.

Sasuke groaned, "There's no way in hell that I'm letting the pride of this village walk home alone."

Naruto scowled, "I can take care of myself!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes as he grabbed one of Naruto's arms and slung it around his shoulders. Yeah, if he kept walking, he'd eventually trip and injure himself on something small like a pebble.

* * *

The walk to Naruto's apartment was hell for Sasuke, because not only did Naruto not shut up when he was drunk, he moved around too much. Why he was best friends with him would become one of the greatest mysteries of Konoha.

They got into his apartment and Sasuke pushed him onto the couch and sat across from him. He rubbed his temples as he observed his friend. He seemed extremely fascinated with his own fingers. It was clear to Sasuke that Naruto had never been exposed to alcohol before now. That was shocking. He'd trained under Jiraiya, the drunken debaucher. How did he go so many years without experiencing even a little bit of it?

"Okay, now would you care to tell me why you're drunk off of your ass this late at night?" Sasuke asked, after watching Naruto play with his fingers for 5 minutes.

Naruto stopped fiddling and his face hardened. "I—I just kind of felt like someone sort of took my heart and launched it into a field of chidori."

Sasuke cringed a little. "You're going to have to be a little more specific about that."

Naruto closed his eyes. He drew in a deep breath before pouring it all out, "Well you give a girl all your love only to have her rip out her heart after you tell her that."

Naruto was still quite drunk, but Sasuke saw where he was going with this. "Well you should have seen that coming. I mean Sakura is just…"

"Not Sakura dumbass! Hinata!" he growled. Wow, Naruto was all types of drunk tonight.

"Hinata huh? Well sorry but I've been out of the loop if you haven't noticed," Sasuke answered. "All right, now can you start over?"

"Since when do you care about how I feel? It's not like relationships or love are your areas of expertise," he slurred once more.

"Since we had the misfortune of becoming best friends. Now start from the beginning," Sasuke demanded.

Naruto didn't really hesitate to launch into his story. Apparently he had been seeing Hinata for a while and he had finally realized just how deep his feelings had been for her. His confession led to them having a hot make out session against her wall and her promptly dumping him right afterwards. At that point he had broken down into tears. He'd never actually seen Naruto cry before and it wasn't something that he liked to see.

Naruto kept blubbering until the alcohol finally got to him about 5 minutes after he had finished the story. He had completely blacked out, and if Sasuke knew anything at all, Naruto would not remember any part of this conversation in the morning.

But he had to say, he didn't exactly enjoy seeing Naruto in this much pain. As much as he had contributed to making Naruto's life a living furnace the past few years, he'd never hated Naruto. He just wanted him out of the way because he had been so blinded by the quest of power. But even then, Naruto never gave up on him. Now, he felt like he owed it to Naruto just a bit.

No, he wasn't planning on fixing his relationship because that was his and Hinata's deal. But at least he could help Naruto get back on his feet. And if he had to actually talk to the Hyuuga heiress, he was willing to do that. It would be a risk; he was still scorned by many in the village, especially the Hyuuga.

When the hell did he become so noble anyway? This would be the last time he'd do anything for Naruto. They were still rivals for the position of Hokage after all…

* * *

**Please Review**

**NO THERE WILL BE NO SASUHINA IN THIS WHATSOEVER! AND DON'T SUGGEST IT EITHER! Yeah that was a tough one to write, I actually had to ask my dad for advice on how to successfully write something sad like that. Yeah, I won't be doing that often. But yeah I'm sorry if you were unhappy about Naruto getting drunk and Hinata being cold and all the OOCness of everyone, but let's just say that everyone is changing a bit. Yeah it was sad to write this chapter but I did it! Well it's going to get intense so fasten your seatbelts! Okay, next update is February 8****th****! Remember I update every Saturday! Loved it? Hated it? Let me know! Plz R&R! Thanks! Til next time! **

**CherryXButterfly(Angel) **


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